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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

I want to help my friend

2 replies

BuffaloB · 17/01/2025 23:16

Hi all,
I'm desperate to help & support my friend.
We have been good friends for over 5 years.
For the last 2 years, friend has been in a relationship where the other person has (from what I've seen / heard) been emotionally abusive, there's been gaslighting, humiliation & my friend's been confused, feeling like their mental health's all over the place & desperately wanting things to be 'good again' but also walking on eggshells as every time they try & discuss issues partner will not accept accountability for actions & shut them down.
Friend has texted/phoned me multiple times when there have been arguments or partner has been hot & cold, causing them to be upset etc.
Last Sunday after a 'perfect weekend' my friend was out of the blue 'dumped' & has spent the last few days in pieces. Distressed, crying, desperate to talk to ex, desperate to make it work. Blaming self.
Have been trying to be supportive but all I've seen is their ex being mean & besides saying 'you will heal, focus on good things, maybe think about NOT contacting them, let's do this/that' I don't know what to do,
I feel like the ex might start playing games & try to get back with friend then destroy them again,
Any advice?
I just want friend to see that they are great & NC with ex is key!

OP posts:
BuffaloB · 17/01/2025 23:51

Thank you.

He's a man.

OP posts:
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