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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Has anyone had a weird relationship with a controlling person?

2 replies

michael1152 · 16/01/2025 21:30

Hi. I met someone one day off a gay dating site. A day after chatting, we arranged to meet 2 days later, but ended up meeting up a day later for a few hours, then they wanted to see me everyday, so went saw each other 12 days in a row.

They stopped overnight here, about 4 /5 times. I stopped there once and net his mother/ sister, he's lived up here for 2 years, apparently escaped an abusive ex who made him dress a certain way, not allowed friends/ used to hit him.

It was going quite, well. Really quick, he texted constantly when he was a work, and at home when we weren't together, then suddenly 1 night he got screenshots off his ex, apparently of me meeting/ caherinngon another lad called Danny, I'd never met a Danny in my life,! Let alone with a red Corsa car! Anyway he was adamant I've cheated and called a weekend away in Blackpool which we'd paid for. And one of these screennshots had this ex and Danny saying where I lived/ worked, all my hobbies and what I did in my life.

I got the police as Inwas really creeper out. And they reconnned the lad I was seeing had made all this up, to go.back to his ex. I also saw my doctor, as the whole thing made my anxiety go through the roof. The Dr reckoned he'd made it all up. I was like whaaaat! He said I've had a really really lucky escape!

He had also shown me this 3 page love letter in his book he'd written all about what he'd mapped out for the rest of out lives and getting married! And also a big list of places where we were gping to.visit. I don't know what anyone else makes of all this? Or had some very weird similar dating experience?

OP posts:
Imbusytodaysorry · 16/01/2025 21:41

michael1152 · 16/01/2025 21:30

Hi. I met someone one day off a gay dating site. A day after chatting, we arranged to meet 2 days later, but ended up meeting up a day later for a few hours, then they wanted to see me everyday, so went saw each other 12 days in a row.

They stopped overnight here, about 4 /5 times. I stopped there once and net his mother/ sister, he's lived up here for 2 years, apparently escaped an abusive ex who made him dress a certain way, not allowed friends/ used to hit him.

It was going quite, well. Really quick, he texted constantly when he was a work, and at home when we weren't together, then suddenly 1 night he got screenshots off his ex, apparently of me meeting/ caherinngon another lad called Danny, I'd never met a Danny in my life,! Let alone with a red Corsa car! Anyway he was adamant I've cheated and called a weekend away in Blackpool which we'd paid for. And one of these screennshots had this ex and Danny saying where I lived/ worked, all my hobbies and what I did in my life.

I got the police as Inwas really creeper out. And they reconnned the lad I was seeing had made all this up, to go.back to his ex. I also saw my doctor, as the whole thing made my anxiety go through the roof. The Dr reckoned he'd made it all up. I was like whaaaat! He said I've had a really really lucky escape!

He had also shown me this 3 page love letter in his book he'd written all about what he'd mapped out for the rest of out lives and getting married! And also a big list of places where we were gping to.visit. I don't know what anyone else makes of all this? Or had some very weird similar dating experience?

He love-bombed you.
I agree with what you were told . He made it all up to use as an excuse to go off and do as he pleased.
loads have sadly been through worse you are lucky .
You could see what he was early on with the help of the police .
This man is dangerous please do t be fooled back to him .

michael1152 · 16/01/2025 23:49

I wonder why he seemed so interested for 12 days in a row, but then was texting the ex on his phone. sat next to me. In my car, and it looked like the ex was begging him back. As I was accused of cheating. His ex said well if is giving me a chance and it was proved I had been heating 2 years down the line, the lad Inwas with would punch me down the face! And why stop at my house a few nights and be very intimate. And then book a little holiday and cancel in 2 days later, saying I've cheated?!

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