Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

He set up a third date but unmatched me on Tinder?

7 replies

PressKaraliene · 07/01/2025 10:26

I am curious about a situation. So I met a guy online around one month ago, we had two dates before Christmas, it seemingly went well, he was messaging me every day, asked for the second date etc. After the second date, he was still reaching out but a bit less so. I did notice however that he had updated one of his Tinder pictures. I decided that he probably wasn’t all that interested and decided to cut my losses, especially as we barely talked during Christmas and he made a few weird comments. However, after NYE he wished me a happy new year, and told me about his holidays. I was a bit lukewarm and didn’t respond to one message after which he messaged again and asked if I feel like meeting up. I said why not and said we can make plans, but didn’t follow up (I genuinely forgot) after which he reached out again and we finally confirmed plans, I suggested a themed bar and he was enthusiastic and suggested a dinner place beforehand.

Here is the weird part - the day after we set up plans, I went on Tinder for a bit (as mentioned, I hadn’t spoken to this guy for a while, and want to keep my options open) and noticed our messages had disappeared, so he’s likely unmatched me. And he hadn’t the day before when he messaged me to set up plans because I was on Tinder then too.

And I’m curious about this behaviour. The likely story is that he doesn’t want me seeing his activity right? But equally, we’ve been matched for a month and he has changed photos so clearly this hasn’t bothered him before. Possibly he’s met someone else but again, why reach out to me (several times?)

I’m all prepared for to be flaked on or ghosted haha, but I’m curious about other people’s experiences, do you normally unmatch people on dating apps? We’ve set up the meeting in the next few days so I guess we’ll see either way.

OP posts:
LouLaBear23 · 07/01/2025 11:35

Are you sure he’s unmatched you and just not come off of Tinder (deactivated his profile?). Of course, there could be suspicious reasons if that’s the case but some people just get sick of the apps

Girlmom35 · 07/01/2025 13:55

So you're now communicating through other chanels than Tinder, right?
Maybe he just doesn't see the point in keeping you on his Tinder list of he's got your number?
Either way, why don't you ask him?

Cardinalita90 · 07/01/2025 19:23

I'm guilty of unmatching on apps once I've been on a date or two. I'm not going to use the app to communicate once I've got their number so I don't see the point of keeping them on there. Especially when we're in the phase of dating but not exclusive.I'd proceed with him but cautiously.

smallsilvercloud · 07/01/2025 19:34

I've only unmatched if I no longer want to date them, maybe he's had a change of heart or he's been booted off the app.

SizzlingPrickle · 07/01/2025 19:35

Cardinalita90 · 07/01/2025 19:23

I'm guilty of unmatching on apps once I've been on a date or two. I'm not going to use the app to communicate once I've got their number so I don't see the point of keeping them on there. Especially when we're in the phase of dating but not exclusive.I'd proceed with him but cautiously.

Same for me.

CraftyNavySeal · 07/01/2025 19:38

smallsilvercloud · 07/01/2025 19:34

I've only unmatched if I no longer want to date them, maybe he's had a change of heart or he's been booted off the app.

I leave the match so I don’t see them come up again as a new match!

Might be worth swiping to see if he comes up again lol

H112 · 08/01/2025 01:10

Nah if he updates his pictures feic him!!

New posts on this thread. Refresh page