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Relationships

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His phone and changes

7 replies

Starsandflowers10 · 23/10/2023 08:44

My boyfriend and I have a 4 year history. When we first met he ruined our connection as he was contacting his ex and various other women online. It drove a wedge between us and the trust died. We split up for a year. When we got back together he came off all social media. He has gradually removed all apps off his phone. We had a great sex life and our relationship finally felt on track.

I've noticed over the last few months he has a strong hatred for his phone and keeps over stating he has no apps. No numbers etc. I have felt his over explaining everytime he has been on it weird. He for example yesterday stated how his phone never disturbs him and he gets no notifications. I said to him you moaned last week the football scores were making your phone ping.

Anyway our sex life came to a grinding halt 4 weeks ago. 4 times a week to absolutely nothing! I have spoken to him 3 times now and he says he depressed and isn't interested In it at all. Which I understand. He recently got a dog and he's decided it will be sharing the bed with us. He's setting no boundaries with the dog it's always in between us and I can feel my irritation getting stronger as the weeks go on and he's shown no attraction or want for me when I stay over.

Yesterday it seemed like he was typing for ages when we was watching tele. I saw what appeared him tap the same key 3 times like an xxx move. I felt confused as he has nothing on his phone. He fell asleep and I felt I needed to know.

I looked through his phone. He has 3 photos of the dog. He's deleted loads of stuff he's sent me there's nothing. There was only messages from me. No apps. I was shocked to see his contact list was all males apart from me and only 12 numbers. But there was a woman's name "liv" saved in their and its a name never mentioned.

The phone is so clean and empty. Our sex life is gone and he's replaced me with a dog.

Other weirdness. I posted the other day.

He has started putting the milk in first when making a cuppa.

When he got the dog we called her Mia but I joked she looked like an old lady. He disagreed He has started saying she looks like a Margaret.

He has trimmed his beard and body hair yesterday which he doesn't often do.

He used to want me all the time physically and constantly wanting sex. He just says he's not a performing monkey and he's not prepared to entertain anything physical because of how he feels. I do respect that. But the dogs constantly getting goo goo gaga talk and cuddles. I feel so pushed out.

What do you think is going on?

OP posts:
19847499fddqqedxx · 23/10/2023 09:45

You don’t trust him just end it

Bookworm20 · 23/10/2023 13:18

19847499fddqqedxx · 23/10/2023 09:45

You don’t trust him just end it

Well the bloke has done a total 360. So is it any wonder shes questioning whether she trusts him.

From what you have put, the over explaining about his phone etc is really odd.
And the sudden turn around from sex and allowing the dog in the bed is odd too. How is he with other people? Is it just you he is being 'depressed' with or is this manifesting with everyone? because if its just you, then you've every right to be thinking and asking whats going on.

But I suspect there may be someone else. Or someone he would like to think could be an else and hence the weirdness with the phone.

Is he getting help with the depression? If its affecting your relationship, he should be eager to get help with it surely. Unless its just an excuse, in which case he isn't going to rush to the gp is he?

Didimum · 23/10/2023 14:28

Regardless of what's going on, a relationship shouldn't be this difficult. Why do you think you deserve to be in a relationship like this?

Whataretheodds · 23/10/2023 14:30

You aren't getting on. You don't trust him.

I wouldn't stay over with a guy who let the dog sleep in bed with us.

I wouldn't stay with a guy who put the milk in before brewing the tea.

Iwillnotdancewiththedevil · 23/10/2023 14:37

^*
He has started putting the milk in first when making a cuppa*^.

Random piece of info, but this could be a deal breaker for me

hallingthedecks · 23/10/2023 15:02

What does the dog look like? I am confused by the dog reference. Do you mean that 'Margaret' is an older woman's name and because of that he's now seeing her as an old lady when he never did before? Has he watched The Crown and thinks the dog looks like Vanessa Kirby?!

Starsandflowers10 · 23/10/2023 15:40

He's awaiting a therapy start date and he is very much hiding from the world yes. He's got a sick note. He'd always suffered from depression and it's never made him loose his interest in me..

She's got a grumpy face the dog.

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