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Relationships

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Original poster

If you are a female and taller than you male partner

17 replies

VelvetVoice · 03/10/2023 23:53

Do you always go for the flatest shoes or still wear some heels?

I'm self conscious of any elevation on my shoes and it is driving me mad - absolutely on me, he has never said anything

He is probably my height or 1 to 2 inches shorter which I don't mind but I still worry when it comes to not making myself a lot taller

How do I get over it?

OP posts:

AuntieMarys · 03/10/2023 23:58

I am 4 inches taller than my dh and always wear flats or a maximum 2 inch chunky boot. I've never worn "heels" even as a young woman.
Glad flat comfy shoes/ trainers are fashionable!

JaneBirkenstocks · 03/10/2023 23:59

My sister is taller than her DH and wears heels when they are out together. They're a good looking couple and not at all self conscious. Why should they be?

Be proud of the couple you're part of, OP and wear your heels with confidence!

larlypops · 03/10/2023 23:59

I still wore heels with my ex and was a few inches taller, it bothered him but not me

Original poster

VelvetVoice · 04/10/2023 00:03

AuntieMarys · 03/10/2023 23:58

I am 4 inches taller than my dh and always wear flats or a maximum 2 inch chunky boot. I've never worn "heels" even as a young woman.
Glad flat comfy shoes/ trainers are fashionable!

I'm a flat shoes / trainers type of woman too but comes cold month some boots have chunky soles and I need more sturdy soles on my trainers too and that is when I struggle

Summer and spring I rock my flat sandals and thin soled trainers and it is all good

OP posts:

Original poster

VelvetVoice · 04/10/2023 00:04

larlypops · 03/10/2023 23:59

I still wore heels with my ex and was a few inches taller, it bothered him but not me

That is where I wanna be asap

OP posts:

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 04/10/2023 00:53

Following with interest. I am tall and wish I had the confidence or inclination I guess to date shorter men as I think this would widen my options a lot but I just can't for some reason (probably the patriarchy )

FloydPepper · 04/10/2023 00:59

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 04/10/2023 00:53

Don’t let the patriarchy dictate your choice of partner to you.

Topographicals · 04/10/2023 02:13

I'm just shy of 6 foot and never thought to worry about heels/boots making me taller until my ex mentioned it one day and said he felt embarrassed, he was an abusive shithead anyway and it didn't last long. My current partner loves anything that makes me feel confident which happens to be very high chunky boots lol

Wtfnowseptember · 04/10/2023 02:21

I've had lots of long term relationships with shorter men and I always wore heels. Dh is only 2" taller and I've always worn heels for occasions. It's absolutely fine.

Newestname002 · 04/10/2023 07:52

Topographicals · 04/10/2023 02:13

How foolish- anyone would think he hadn't noticed your height when the two of you started dating....🌹

Lagershandy · 04/10/2023 08:00

I am the exact same height as my DH, but I wear heels sometimes when we go 'out' out. We also do ballroom and Latin dancing, so heels are a must for me.
it makes me a couple of inches taller, but DH is a confident bloke and it doesn't bother him so it doesn't bother me.

Sugaredwatermelon · 04/10/2023 08:43

Hi OP, I am 6ft1.

I wear heels if I want to, and just look down on anyone that has an issue with it (hehe).

AmiablePedant · 04/10/2023 17:24

A long time ago I was going out to a fairly dressy event with a chap who was a good 3" shorter than me. Picking me up from my place beforehand, he found me in my finery putting on my Tactfully Flat Shoes. "Please stop that!" said he, "They don't work with the dress and there's nothing more dashing than a tall woman in high heels."
Not sure whether this was a faintly sexist remark in retrospect, but at the time (somewhere in the Pleistocene) it made me respect him a lot.

chocolateaddict231 · 04/10/2023 17:27

I dated someone shorter (who I think had angry short man syndrome tbh) and only wore flats. He even joked when we broke up that it was never going to work as I was taller! I felt more comfortable wearing flats as I felt awkward about my height with him. Am now happier with a taller (and nicer!) man

Frith2013 · 04/10/2023 17:32

I've never worn heels or any other clothing injurious to women, on principle.

I've been taller than 3 of my exes. I was probably 8 inches taller than one of them. It never came up in conversation.

Brefugee · 04/10/2023 17:52

I'm about an invmch taller than DH. I'm mostly in Chucks or Docs, but I sometimes wear absolute skyscraper heels.

Neither of us has a problem with it

Inaquandrydoinglaundry · 04/10/2023 17:53

I am 6ft tall and have never found my attraction was based on height, so dated several shorter men before I married.

I know that some men are intimidated by women who are taller than them... their insecurities are not my problem!

I cba with heels but have always worn platform shoes if I felt like it.

Life's too short to worry about how thick your soles are - if anyone judges you for being taller than DH, they are the weirdo!

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