Not been on for a while but REALLY need some advice folks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Toothache]

Hiya MN,

Been having a tough time at work recently with a colleague who has been telling lies about me.... saying I surf all day.... complaining about my behaviours... spreading gossip about me etc. She's staff and I'm a Contractor so she has the upper hand in that one!

Anyway... I've officially complained about her over the last couple of months , but keep being told about things she's saying about me. It's playground stuff honestly! I'm extrovert and LOUD! been there over 2 years and it's not been a problem until she's started spouting off to senior management. No matter how much people know it's her bitchin, it's still damaging. Mud sticks and all that.

Anyway.... my friend at work announced today that she was having an affair with a guy at work whose partner works here too.

I knew they had been flirting for months viw email and had had a cheeky snog at xmas, but that was it. Anyway she confessed all to me this morning, right before she got a text from him saying she knew everything and was on her way to find her and make a scene......which she did. she came to my friends desk right next to me and just simply hissed.... "I know about you both"

Anyway... said bitchy colleague then went on to tell everyone what had happend and said I'd told everyone!!! eh??????? I didn't KNOW!

When I left my desk to make yet another complaint about her she then told my friend to watch her back from me as I was off to tell everyone. And that she should watch what she tells me.

WTF????

I ended up crying today to my line manager who totally knows my side. However to complain to my manager I had to tell him what happened (by this point it was out anyway).

BIG drama....loads of meetings with friend, bloke and partners managers..... Turns out that our departmental director knew about half an hour after it all kicked off... and commented on the fact that I had been stirring it all.

it could ONLY be the bitchy colleagues doing.

HELP.... what do I do??????

I've worked there for years, have loads of friends who are behind me , but this person is slating me and damaging my reputation big time! And trying to ruin my friendships.....

Don't know what I'm asking, but MY GOD it's pissing me off!!

I think that you need to point out to your line manager that this other person's behaviour is making your position at the firm untenable. State bluntly that you have done none of the things she says you have and you are disappointed that, after two years of outstanding work with no problems whatsoever, this new person comes along and people are prepared to believe her over you. Tell him/her that, if this is the way they want to play it, fine, but you will have to look at moving elsewhere.

It's a risk, but I would bet that they wouldn't want to lose you after all the good work you've done. If they are sensible they will see that none of these problems were present during all the time you've worked there and have only arisen since this person started. Have to be blind to fail to spot this.

Or take out a grievance against her and make it plain you think that her behaviour is bullying you out of a job. Freckle once more.

Tempting though it is, I'm not sure the grievance procedure can be used if you are not an employee. Toothache is an independent contractor. She may be able to sue for breach of contract as it is probably an implied term of her contract that they must provide her with a reasonable working environment, but that might be a bit of a stretch.

Oh yes hadnt thought of that. Unless toothy is in a union and they could help.

Thanks you guys. No Union unfortuunately. I'm self employed. I have raised this with my Line Manager(s) and they spoke to her. We all thought it had blown over until this incident yesterday.

I hadn't thought of it as bullying before, but you're right. She IS bullying me. It's all so playground. Can't believe she's getting to me like this. I'd love to say it was washing over me coz that would really piss her off.... but it clearly isn't.

Even self employed you can be in a union toothy! [stern look emoticon!]

Is there some reason why you are self-employed? It sounds to me as though you should actually be an employee - you work in the same place, they tell you what to do, you are paid a regular salary, etc. What benefit do you get from being self-employed? You lose out on holiday and sick pay, plus a whole load of employment rights. I'm sure the Inland Revenue would probably consider that you are an employee. And, if you were an employee, you could raise an official grievance and have this mess sorted out once and for all. As it is you are left relying on people's goodwill and their skills as managers.

May be talking out of my arse, but could you sue her for libel? I'd be tempted to.

Freckle - I'm self-employed as most people in my profession are. I'm an IT Project Planner. Plus if I went staff, my salary would half. Unfortunately I can't afford that now I'm on my own and have the family home to pay for from my salary. I'd love the security of a permanent job. And being self-employed is a right PITA sometimes!!

I'm hoping this all calms down next week, but I'm not going to let it lie though. She can't get away with this. She has had another member of staff reduced to tears in the past.... hence why she was moved to out team! grrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

ib - your suggestion is sorely tempting!!