How does this online dating work??

[Bonkerz]

Been separated since Nov 2018. Was married for 17 years.
Joined POF a few weeks ago. After a few weirdos and pervs I've decided to come off the site.
I am however chatting with 2 men.
One is nice enough. A bit full on. Doesn't want committed relationship which is fine but does tend to turn chat to smut if I'm not careful.
He's begging for a meet.
2nd man is great. We have a lot in common. Both happy to go with flow. I fancy him a lot more than first guy and we did arrange to meet last week but we had to mutually cancel. No talk to rearrange but we talk every day.

Tbh it all feels a bit odd. I've been out the game for so long I don't know what's expected of me.

First guy JUST wants a shag. Unless that's what you want stop wasting your time and block and delete. Second guy - why not arrange to meet up? Everyone is different but when I was doing OLD I really disliked the constant text chat. Cut to the chase and see what they're like in real life.

Important point - you don't owe anyone you've talked to or met a couple of times anything and they don't owe you anything. Keep it light. If it stops being fun and interesting stop doing it.

If you don't arrange to meet people relatively soon I find it turns into some sort of penpal arrangement, which a lot of people online are happy with but it was never for me.

First date - coffee, walk, drinks. Save dinner for later. Arrange something you can cut short if necessary.

Just get stuck in!

Thanks. To be honest after speaking to bloke one and a few others I'd kind of decided maybe I wasn't quite ready and then guy 2 came along and I found myself thinking I'd like to see what happens with him.

I'm gonna bite the bullet and ask no2 out for coffee.

It's made worse by exh being a bit broken and I'm worried how he will take the news I'm dating. I had left my marriage long before he had I think hence I'm ready to have some fun.

You not wanting seedy messages from creeps with no social skills doesn't mean you're not ready - you just need to familiarise yourself with the block and delete buttons. It's a numbers game. Rattle through it, don't agonise over it.

And yes good luck! Don't worry about your ex. Who's going to tell him anyway?

There'll always been seedy people on OLD.

Join the dating thread...lots of advice and experience of OLD!

Yes join the OLD thread-lots of great advice

Man 1 sounds like a no-goer.. Delete and block

You don't owe a random person you have not met irl anything