Age gap relationship. My other half is about to turn 40.

[JK2012]

Hi all, I’ve been with my OH for 6.5 years. I already had DS (8) when we met and we have DD (3). We were 20&33 when we met. Now 27 and nearly 40.

Our age gap has never been in issue. We get on well, we are compatible and both wanted the same things from a relationship. We are settled, own a home etc and our age gap isn’t noticeable. He looks younger whereas I’ve always looked older than what I am and the age has never been an issue with anything yet.

But I’ve got this weird feeling about him being 40. We’ve always been one decade apart if you get my drift.. 20’s and 30’s. Soon it will be 20’s and 40’s 😩 nothing will change of course...

But what about when he’s 50 and I’m in my 30’s. When he’s 60 and I’m in for 40’s and so on...

Anyone else growing out with a guy older than them? How is it? Does it change? How do you feel about it?

Does it really matter?

It wouldn't matter at all to me. It seems like you both get on well, which is the main thing. Age is just a number.

Coincidentally, my DH is soon to turn 40, whereas I'm still early 30's, but it doesn't bother me in the slightest!

i'm similar, currently in my 40 while dh is in his 60s [grin[ it's fine but i do worry about retirement as i'll be working longer and he will be lounging about at home

In a couple of years you’ll be 30s and 40s though.

You may find nothing changes, or that he slows down and seems like a bit of a bore as the years go by.

We all change with age and we generally all slow down a bit too...his time will come sooner than yours.

Of course there are some very fit and energetic older people. A friend married a man who was 17 years older, but he was physically fit. He went hiking, for runs etc and looked after himself, but he was still mistaken for her dad on occasion.

We're the opposite way round, I'm older (f) approx the same age gap as you, my OH is a gym bunny, I'm menopausal but I havnt mentioned it to him, basically suffering in silence! We get on like a house on fire, same thoughts on life, holidays etc, been together years, still in love. This is what I worry about, him thinking what you're thinking, 😘

My husband was in his early 40s when I met him in my late 20s. He’s now in his mid 50s and I’m in my early 40s. It’s not a big deal, honestly.

My DH and I have exactly the same gap, OP, and we were your ages when we met, so I'm now 37 and he's just turned 50. We've just had a baby.

I feel we meet in the middle of our ages in terms of how old we come across. He doesn't look 50,:either, although people would definitely say he's older than me, perhaps mid-40s. He's going to be a SAHD so I can imagine when it son is older people will assume DH is his grandad (he has grey hair) but neither of us care. We are happy and there's a lot of love.

To be truthful, him being in the next decade up will feel no different.

Same boat here OP, I'm 28 and my fellas 41. Doesnt look it, doesn't feel it. Were so compatible and happy we dont even notice it! We just had a little one. Sometimes he gets antsy that I'll be 'flirty thirties' whilst hes in his 50s lol but I just reassure him and remind him what it took for us to find each other! We dont notice it now so I doubt we will in another ten years.
Xxx

I understand how you feel. My DP is 15 years older, and I felt a bit funny for a couple of weeks either side of him turning 60. It was as if I expected something to change.

It didn’t. He’s still lovely, and we’re getting married soon. It’ll pass, OP.

Same age gap here. Hes 43, I'm 30. I love it. I imagine being with a bloke my age and cringe. They all seem so immature.
We share so many of the same values and have a lot of life experience between us. He's my best friend. He never judges. He's got a good solid career. (and I also think his greying hair and laughter lines round the eyes are sexy as hell!!! )

I'm 28 and he's 38 ... and just had our little girl , just not a problem ! Age really doesn't matter !

My parents had 25year age gap...and had 35 years together before my father passed away. My mother passed away only a couple of years later, obviously much younger. It worked for them. My father was fit and hale until nearly 90, my mother has serious health issues from mid fifties...you never know what life will bring. Enjoy each other.