SIL possibly ignoring me

[westminsternews]

I whatsapped my SIL on Friday at 12:30 which she read at around 16:30 but ignored so I followed up at 18:30 which she read at 21:00 and also ignored.

I can't think of any reason why she would be ignoring me, but she has form for using silence to express her annoyance.

It's playing on my mind. What shall I do?

I should add I'm a mildly paranoid anxious type!

Let her get on with her sulk and don't try and engage.

I’d suggest you shrug your shoulders and get on with your day. It gets annoying and even a little hurtful when you send a message and are greeted with the abyss of silence. You just learn to not take it personally and focus on friends and family who do take the time to respond.

Unless of course you actually did something to warrant the silence? Like err...run over her car, insult her dress sense, perhaps steal her car and rack up speeding fines whilst playing a little light jazz...anyway, ahem. Get on with your day and have fun

I would deal with my anxiety and ignore the SIL lack of replies. If you have done something wrong in her mind then she needs to tell you. If she doesn’t then it can’t be resolved by you. It could well be that she is ill or has something more important to deal with

How do you usually address your anxiety ? Focus on that , a walk, run, yoga, book anything but this

If it goes on then it will be up to your husband or brother to intercede to establish what the problem is.

Is it possible that she has read and forgotten to reply. I’m shocking for that. I read a message and will decide to respond later and totally forget

If you have done something she isnt communicating it to you. Maybe it would open up a can of worms. Id just leave it. Dont agonise wondering what u did. If you think u know u r probably right but if u really cannot fathom it, then dont pick your self wondering.

Use the telephone.

I really can't think of anything. The last text messages were all normal and happy etc. So I really don't understand.

She's working away at the moment and we haven't made plans to go and see her (we have a baby) at a push, this could be it, but I doubt it. If it is that's pretty sad.. she should also tell me shouldn't she?

I'm hoping she's just forgotten or couldn't be bothered to reply.

She was online at the same time as me when she read the last text I sent.

I really hate this type of thing!

@festivellama I am using the telephone, the WhatsApp function...

But if you're suggesting I call, and say what?

Pick up the phone and actually call? What is it, the 1990’s? actually that’s not a bad idea. Could always call and arrange a hook up. Go for coffee. Oh wait. Better. Coffee and cake. I love cake.

Are you sure that she's not just busy. She's only not responded for an evening and if she's working away she'll probably have things on.

Well I'm hoping it is just because she's busy, but everyone's busy and most people reply. It's been nearly two days

I would just call her. Think of a reason to. Don't mention the whatsapp messages or the fact you think she's ignoring you.

Like PPs have said she might just have been busy

I won't call her now though.. we have a party to go to soon and she and my BIL are supposed to be getting a lift with us. So I'll have to contact her about that soon

Did you ask her a question or has she just not responded to a comment?

As Tripping says if it is not an actual question requiring an actual answer maybe she just has nothing to say

Let your dh deal with her...

I asked how she was. Then followed up with 'hope you're doing ok'.

Maybe she is having a shit time and feeling like crap but doesn't want to burden you. Maybe you contact her too often and she is attempting to cut down the messages you send her. Maybe she was doing something but saw the notification but wanted to clear the notification but didn't have time to answer.

The shit time one could be true, I don't send enough messages to be a burden and of course she could just busy.. just odd really!

My SIL is the same, every text I send she doesn't respond too :( it saddens me but I have just stopped texting now, it is what it is :(

I still haven't heard anything.

Do I send a text saying 'are you ignoring me?' to make sure? At least then I can deal with it, if there is a problem of course

What was in your message to her on Friday?

And if she's working away, why would she be upset that you don't visit her?

No don't text her asking if she's ignoring you! Stop being so needy.

Oh gosh is this me??

I have been SO busy this week sorting stuff for daughter and then for a friend who is moving house. I'd promised I'd help pack on Friday but work was soo busy I finally got to hers about 2 instead of about 10 like I'd said. I haven't had time to ring or text anybody as I spent all Friday afternoon on runs to the tip and charity shop.

Wait and give her time to reply. She's probably busy like me. Go and be busy yourself, stop worrying what she's thinking.