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Original poster

When did the honeymoon period end?

17 replies

Runrabbit1 · 21/09/2017 21:20

When did your honeymoon period end and how did things change after that in your relationship?

I'm finding it was about a year that it was intense and magical and he texted me every 20 mins or so and emailed and rung and moved heaven and earth to see me. He got jealous, he cared, I was his top priority... I thought we were the only people in the world to feel this way!

And now.... average and quite the opposite on some points. Just want to see how the rest of you faired...

OP posts:
maxthemartian · 21/09/2017 21:26

I can't say there was a specific change really. Of course the excitement shifted to a greater comfort with each other and an intimacy but the effort and consideration is still there a decade in.

Thinking about it that's why his predecessors became exes and he didn't!

Original poster
Runrabbit1 · 21/09/2017 21:29

That's the key I think.... effort and consideration!

OP posts:
Softkittysillykitty · 21/09/2017 21:38

Is he still affectionate even if it's not in that early intense crazy for you kind of way?

Josuk · 21/09/2017 21:56

OP - intense and magical is great.
But texting every 20min, in addition to more emails and chats - that doesn't sound like a honeymoon, that sounds a little over the top.

But, details aside - no relationship can stay in the early 'in-love'phase, where you see your beloved through rose-tinted glasses. And not notice the rest of people around you.
That phase morphs into 'love' phase.
Maybe not as intense as the first one, but definitely more sustainable in the long term.

Or, things may be fizzling out.
It's hard to tell.

TheNaze73 · 21/09/2017 22:15

I don't think what you had was sustainable

Costaricachica · 21/09/2017 22:18

Runrabbit1 - he sounds like a control freak/ narc/ sociopath. Red flag alert!

Trollspoopglitter · 21/09/2017 22:23

Honemoon ends when your beloved eats dodgy food, and then does the smelliest poo ever - failing to open the bathroom window. And as you literally taste the shite somewhere in the back of your throat while scrambling to crack open the window.... the tinted glasses crack a bit.

Redken24 · 21/09/2017 22:26

Think that it depends on your relationship. Not every one is straightforward, if yu have big hurdles to face together it can mean that you don't experience a long honeymoon phase?

maxthemartian · 21/09/2017 22:27

Trolls that's a very vivid picture you paint Grin

Softkittysillykitty · 21/09/2017 22:28

Trolls, that made me proper laugh! Grin

Time40 · 21/09/2017 22:46

After about twenty years (seriously), but he's still lovely.

offside · 21/09/2017 23:26

I think in some respects we're still in the honeymoon period (6 years on) - still besotted with one another, can't wait yo see each other after work, miss each other when we're away for a period of time....

But in other respects it was over after about a year and all the better for it. I feel much more secure and settled, comfortable and safe and just absolutely loved which feels more real than the lusty can't keep our hands of each constant contact stage.

winterwinter · 23/09/2017 23:10

Been together five years and married nearly two and honestly I feel like it’s still going on. Albeit we are no longer jumping in to bed every five minutes but as pp have suggested the relationship has lead to a greater level of comfort and companionship with one another- we actually spend more time together now than when we first got together.

mindutopia · 24/09/2017 08:03

The carefree, spontaneous, fun all the time period ended when we started having kids (5 ish years in). But there wasn't like a massive change in behaviour. We were just more settled with less time to focus on each other. We never really had that giddy, intense bit at the beginning. We were just happy and it worked. There was never jealousy or texting all the time and then it stopped. I think maybe because we had a good relationship (with exes, yes, but this was always different, I agree, probably why it worked and 9 years later we're still happy). He still responds to texts when I need him and we text about our days, same as we always did, but it was never constant and over the top (we just aren't like that). But I would say it was relatively easy and fun until real responsibilities hit (home, children, work-family balance). It's still happy but more settled and not as breezy and spontaneous as it was when we were dating of course. I think if there is a massive drop off in interest and enthusiasm it's maybe a sign it's not quite the right relationship.

RunRabbitRunRabbit · 24/09/2017 08:07

You never had a honeymoon period. You had a weird obsessive jealous period. That's not magical. That's a nightmare.

PickAChew · 24/09/2017 08:11

Jealousy and obsessive texting is all a bit unhinged, really. I never let those types get through the honeymoon phase to find out when it would end because they were so fucking annoying.

londonista · 24/09/2017 09:17

When does it end? Don't know I hope not soon or ever. 13 years on and ever time my phone beeps i hope its him 😍.

Even if it's just "don't forget we need more bum wipes when you go shopping". It normally is something like that, tbf!!

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