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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Needy STBXH

26 replies

RockPaperCut · 19/05/2017 09:44

This is the situation that happens on a regular basis. I need to know if it's normal or perhaps I'm just too emotionally stunted as he likes to put it.

For background we're divorcing, still living together whilst completing on the sale of the house, 5 weeks to go, thank fuck!

Stbxh is due to leave, 35-45 minutes before he leaves he starts with "now daddy's gotta go" "daddys going to work" "I'm going to miss you" "wish I could stay" lots of kisses and cuddles etc. And this gradually builds up until he leaves, by which time the dc are either hysterical or close to it. He then leaves me to console them. Had he just been relaxed about it, said goodbye and left dc wouldn't get so upset.

Other times dc are busy doing craft, watching a movie or whatever. He sits there pawing at them like above until they get upset. Wtf is wrong with him? Or I'm I being unfair?

OP posts:
RockPaperCut · 19/05/2017 19:26

No he's not reasonable in the slightest.

We had a long conversation yesterday we're he blamed me for having PND twice, "it was far too much pressure on him, he didn't know how to support me and if I'd been more vocal then he would have done his fair share." Hmm

As much as I wish I could lessen contact, I can't, I'm stuck with him as my dc father. With any luck, I hope that once he is in London, he finds other 'distractions'at least then his attempts at controling me would lessen.

YY, he absolutely has to be the good guy at all costs. In time the dc will become wise to it, I hope. But until then I will try and minimise the effect of his fuckwitery.

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