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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

xDH is being charged for historic violence against me

8 replies

rosiemorag · 15/02/2017 09:56

I called the police a few weeks ago after xDH showed up to my house to demand access to the kids outwith his normal hours. By the time they arrived he had left but I was an anxious mess. I ended up giving them a statement about our relationship and instances of when he'd been physically abusive.

I left him a few months ago due to this and also his binge drinking.

The police called today to say he'd been detained and would be charged. I'm in Scotland.

Does anyone have any experience of recording historic abuse like this? There are no direct witnesses to anything. I really didn't think they'd have enough to charge him at all.
I am really scared at how angry I'll have made him but I know that's just the victim in me.

I'm just looking for any advice or help about what to expect or what might happen next.

OP posts:
Carollocking · 15/02/2017 10:05

Sorry I can't help advice but my heart is with you

BastardGoDarkly · 15/02/2017 10:07

I don't know the process either, just wanted to offer a hand hold, you did the right thing, it'll be ok Flowers

Ineedmorelemonpledge · 15/02/2017 12:29

https://www.victimsupportsco.org.uk/help-for-victims/

Perhaps give these a call OP, for support on the process and expectations, and also some RL morale?

rosiemorag · 15/02/2017 14:10

Thanks for your support and the link, I'll check it out.

OP posts:
hellsbellsmelons · 15/02/2017 14:19

Well done on telling them.
Ensure they keep you informed on when he is released etc....
The police DV team should also support you now so ensure you get that.
Hope they have it in Scotland!? It's usually better there I believe.

rosiemorag · 15/02/2017 19:34

Update: nothing is happening regarding him being charged. he was detained yesterday and the PF decided there was insufficient evidence to go to court today so he was released.
I'm absolutely gutted.

OP posts:
hellsbellsmelons · 15/02/2017 19:38

Oh that's crap. I'm so sorry.
I've no idea what happens now.
Chin up. Keep going and keep strong.

Carollocking · 15/02/2017 20:41

If like England you'll need get a restraining order now

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