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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Husband has just been arrested for assaulting me

19 replies

ABitCrapReally · 11/02/2017 04:10

It 4am, the police have taken my husband into custody. I have 2 small dc. And I'm more scared of my ndn than my husband.
I have no friends/family near by and I'm scared to death.
What do I do?
I can't drive, but I have some cash? Should I wake the kids and get a hotel room?
Please someone be up to give me advice. I'm like a pathetic, scaredy, jelly!

OP posts:
IveBecomeSoNumb · 11/02/2017 04:11

Deep breaths Flowers

Why are you scared of your ndn?
Big unmumsnetty hugs to you x

Original poster
ABitCrapReally · 11/02/2017 04:14

My husband and ndn had a bit of an argument earlier, to be honest that's why I rang the police. I was scared my DH was gonna get his head kicked in. I'm scared of ndn wife kicking my head in if her DH is approached by police.
Wish I'd just gone to bed early like I planned! Sad

OP posts:
Littleballerina · 11/02/2017 04:14

What happened?

fruitbats · 11/02/2017 04:14

why did the police take him?

Littleballerina · 11/02/2017 04:15

Sorry, posted too soon.
Are police aware that you are worried about your ndn?

fruitbats · 11/02/2017 04:18

Why was he arrested for assaulting you?

Badgoushk · 11/02/2017 04:22

What is an ndn?

Original poster
ABitCrapReally · 11/02/2017 04:22

The police know I'm worried.
All a bit of silly men having a drunken row. Ndn punched DH a few times. I was scared and said, if you don't stop I'll ring the police!
Thought I was ringing the non emergency number, but in my tired/drunken state rang 911 which put me through to the emergency services.
They stopped, DH came inside, but a few minutes later tried to get back out to 'finish off the fight'
I stood in the way off the door pleading with him to stop, unaware the phone was still on the line. Police heard me pleading, have come here and arrested him.
I'm scared my ndn will be arrested for assaulting DH and they will come after me.

OP posts:
Original poster
ABitCrapReally · 11/02/2017 04:23

I'm physically ok

OP posts:
FriendofBill · 11/02/2017 04:26

I doubt they will do anything after the police have been there this eve.

He has punched DH now, I don't think he will carry it on sober/tomorrow do you?

FriendofBill · 11/02/2017 04:27

It is frightening watching people fighting.

Original poster
ABitCrapReally · 11/02/2017 04:28

I hope not. They are a funny pair though Confused I might just get up early and clear off.

OP posts:
FriendofBill · 11/02/2017 04:28

Would be best all round to have police involved and re set boundaries.

fruitbats · 11/02/2017 04:29

Bad ndn = next door neighbour

FriendofBill · 11/02/2017 04:31

You will have to face them sooner or later.
I would say that you didn't want them to get into trouble but the situation was crazy.
That you are glad everyone is ok.
Live and let live.

ElderDruid · 11/02/2017 04:40

Have the police asked for a statement from you? I would make a big issue about how you are concerned for your safety with NDN, what do they advise you do? If you've not been asked for a statement yet, ring 101 and advise your DH is in custody, but you feel unsafe, you don't know what you should do as you have 2 small children.

PP has said you'll have to face them at some point, as it's your property, you can't stay in a hotel long term.

If you need to go out tomorrow, I don't know if you drive, but put the voice recorder on your phone to capture anything that's said to you. I don't think it can be used as evidence, but it could prompt the police to have a chat with NDN. I would hope both of them would prefer to avoid more trouble though.

I'm really sorry you're in this situation. Flowers

FriendofBill · 11/02/2017 04:45

If you want to escape them all, including your H you could go to refuge?
Has your H been like this before?

Thinkingblonde · 11/02/2017 08:38

Are you in USA op? You said you rang 911.

GingerAndTheBiscuits · 11/02/2017 08:45

911 in the U.K. automatically diverts to 999

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