Just like we often hear married men (MM) who have affairs say ‘my wife doesn’t understand me’, ‘we’re in separate rooms’, ‘only together for the kids etc’, I’ve found through supporting BSs, that a lot of married women who have affairs say they are in a physically abusive relationship when they are caught cheating by the OBS/BW (other betrayed spouse/betrayed wife), and plead to the OBS/BW either directly or through the MM, not to tell her husband or she’ll get beaten up.
This often leaves some BW a bit conflicted about whether to tell the OBS or not, because they don’t want another woman to get beaten up and then feel responsible.
More often than not, I think it’s an excuse to save herself from getting outed, but wanted to see if how often it might actually be true and if anyone here had experience of it.
Now, I have no doubt that this may be the case sometimes, but I have to wonder why a woman in a relationship with such a violent man, would actually risk having an affair knowing what could happen if she was found out. I get that she wants to feel loved, but surely with someone so violent it’s not worth the risk, is it?