It's our parents 70th this year. Both parents. My brother set a date for lunch (that suits him. Happy to fit around him for that date). He wanted to get a gift which I know my parents will not like and it'll sit in the cupboard. I suggested getting a photo of the grandchildren. He says they're busy now so we can just get a photo of the kids at lunch(?). He's gone ahead and bought said gift I said they wouldn't like. To be honest he's a bit of a tight arse and obviously has his budget. I suggested this place I know they like and go to near to where they live. He said they were too busy and looked too adult. And he suggested this pub restaurant place more near to where he lives saying it wasmore kiddy friendly. I think it's cos he saw the price and had a sharp intake of breath but I know my parents won't like this place. So I suggested afternoon tea instead at the place I know my parents like so it'll be cheaper. I rang up and they've even waived the cost of the hiring of a private room for us and the kids could share afternoon tea. He said he still doesn't think it's a good idea because of the kids (his are 10 and 16 so hardly children) but we could have use of a private room so we won't be bothering anyone. So he suggested the place near him again, that they think it's too expensive to them and if not the place they suggest, we just get them a voucher for said place and forego lunch altogether!!!! I know the most important thing for my parents would be that the family spends quality time together but we (as in parents and us) always have this situation where it has to suit him, his timetable and near him in places I know my parents will not like. Him and his wife have good jobs and just bought themselves 2 new cars, yet their priorities are always wrong. AIBU? Fraid I had a go at him as my parents talk to me all the time about their selfishness and I try to keep out of it where possible - but I'd like him to get his finger out for once and stop thinking what suits him and not everyone else.