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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Split the bill or not?what would you have done?

56 replies

user1471888857 · 24/08/2016 12:37

So I met up by myself with a friend and her 3 children for lunch.
I ordered my food and a drink which in total came to £10 exactly.
My friends food was £10 and for the 3 kids it was £22.
The bill came for £42 and my friend said "so that's £21 each"
I was kind of flustered and didn't want to come across greedy so I just paid the £22.
What the hell..surely she knew her share was more with the 3 kids.

OP posts:
AntoninArtaud · 24/08/2016 12:40

This is why I don't see the benefits in splitting the bill, and always insist on paying for my own share. I don't see why you should pay for her children!

StillDrSethHazlittMD · 24/08/2016 12:42

Your friend is a crafty sod and she knows it. And not much of a friend.

Shayelle · 24/08/2016 12:42

Wow. Cheek!!! Angry

user1471888857 · 24/08/2016 12:43

It happened pretty fast ..she had her share on the table and purse was away and she was taking her youngest to the toilet.
I'm not a greedy person and Her kids are lovely but I'm not made of money myself.

OP posts:
Tomselleckhaskindeyes · 24/08/2016 12:48

I have 3 kids wouldn't dream of doing this. How rude.

ImperialBlether · 24/08/2016 12:51

That's really cheeky! So your bill would've been £10? It's one thing for you to offer to split it (if you have the money and the inclination) but for her to assume? That's not on.

SocksRock · 24/08/2016 12:57

I have 3 kids and am always scrupulous about paying my full share. My best meals out are with friends who also have 3 kids and then we just split it :-)

PurpleDaisies · 24/08/2016 12:58

Wow, that's so cheeky! I would have just paid my share.

DixieWishbone · 24/08/2016 13:00

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TealGiraffe · 24/08/2016 13:00

Wow so cheeky!! I don't have kids, and when i go out with my friends that do they always put in extra as they have more people! If it was a couple of quid for one kids meal i wouldn't be arsed, but she basically conned you out of a tenner!

MiddleClassProblem · 24/08/2016 13:01

That's very cheeky, I would have liked to have said "oh, mines just a tenner but I'll do the service too" but prob would have done what you did tbh.

Can we help you find a username though?

Chottie · 24/08/2016 13:01

That is out of order. I would not be meeting her for lunch again in a hurry.

SocksRock · 24/08/2016 13:02

Um, I usually I have to pay more? I'm the one with all the kids and I would never assume anyone was happy to subsidise them. We just split when we have an equal number of children - my best friend has 3 as well, so nice and easy then.

OlennasWimple · 24/08/2016 13:05

I've been pleasantly surprised when friends without children have split the bill evenly with me with 2 DC, but I would never, ever expect it.

KitKat1985 · 24/08/2016 13:05

She was out of order. Next time make sure to get in first and put a tenner down and say 'that should cover what I ordered' or similar before she suggests splitting it.

user1471888857 · 24/08/2016 13:12

I've been trying to change my user name but can't remember what password I chose Angry

OP posts:
Floggingmolly · 24/08/2016 13:12

Massively cheeky; unless she's actually a bit thick?

clam · 24/08/2016 13:13

This sort of thing pisses me off. If ever I'm in a group and splitting the bill is suggested, I will always be the one to check that everyone's happy about that and offer to pay more if I've had wine and others haven't.

But I bet if you'd quite reasonably pointed out that there were 4 of them and 1 of you, she'd have gone away thinking you were being stingy.

maddiemookins16mum · 24/08/2016 13:17

Cheeky mare!!

AdjustableWench · 24/08/2016 13:17

Next time she wants to go out I'd suggest a picnic in the park. She brings food for herself and her kids; you bring your own. If she turns down the idea you'll know why.

PersianCatLady · 24/08/2016 13:17

You should have said no it is £42 / 5 so that makes £8.40 each, here is £9.

She would have soon put you right that yours was £10.

expatinscotland · 24/08/2016 13:18

'I was kind of flustered and didn't want to come across greedy so I just paid the £22.'

That's exactly what she was counting on. She's got a helluva cheek. That would be the last time I met up with her unless you're able to develop some assertiveness and call her out when she tries this on or tell her before meeting that there'll be no splitting the bill.

ParanoidGynodroid · 24/08/2016 13:26

WWIHD, you ask? I'd probably have paid up in shocked disbelief and fumed afterwards, probably starting an MN thread to grumble!

But I'd also have made a mental note to avoid this pisstaker in future.

IsItGinTimeYet · 24/08/2016 13:27

I have three DC's and more often than not pay the entire bill when we meet one friend for lunch. Your friend is trying to pull a fast one!

MargaretCavendish · 24/08/2016 13:27

I would love to say that I would have spoken up but I know I wouldn't because I had an incident quite like this the other day! Went out for lunch after a work event with three work contacts (so a network-y rather than fun trip, but on my own dime). They picked somewhere where the only vegetarian thing on the menu was a large mixed salad, which I think cost about £8. I had that and a lemonade. End of the meal: 'oh, we owe £35 each'. To my shame, I said nothing and handed over the whole extortionate lot! I was surprised that no one else spoke up, though - there had been a slight palaver over me ordering so they all knew that I was just having a mixed salad as my lunch while they tucked into steak and chips. So, OP, let's both promise ourselves that we'll be braver and less ripped off next time?!

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