Right, need help not to contact ex, please

[SilvaCaledonia]

My h has been an utter cunt and has now left. It's a long story, just the usual.

I am ok, but when I start to feel anxious and worried my instinct is to contact him. We've been together for twenty years and he would usually be the person I speak to about things.

I need to break the habit! So am turning to MN for hep, as I don't want to bother rl friends too much.

New phone number
New email address
Change the locks
Tell people in real life

I wish I could, but need to communicate about the dcs

Do bother real life friends. They will want to be there for you as you would them.

Go for coffee, arrange to pop over and see them, start doing things for yourself that you don't need to tell him about.

You can keep your old phone just for him and turn it off except for when you need contact

Just distract! I know what it's like, but unfortunately he isn't your partner or your friend.
The more you continue to look for that from him, the less you will be able to make those bonds else where.
It's hard in the beginning, but keep going and it will get better.