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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Looking for advice from fellow NC'ers - DF keeps tracking me down & trying to contact me

3 replies

MrsBertMacklin · 03/04/2016 10:21

Would really love some advice from others who are No Contact with relatives about this one, please.

I went NC with my father about 10 years ago. No abuse, 'just' a very difficult relationship with a horrible, spiteful man who I no longer wanted to deal with.

I used to get letters from him trying to reestablish contact, which were ignored. I then moved home.

He then tracked down my place of work and wrote to me there. I ignored, asked my workplace to take my details off their website and locked down my LinkedIn profile.

He has now written to me at my current workplace. He must have created a fake LinkedIn profile in order to do this, as I have no public profile and no details available to second-connections other than my name.

I don't know whether to just keep ignoring or to just write back 'stop stalking me or it'll be the police'.

My fear is that he's going to turn up at my workplace and make a scene, which would be completely in character.

OP posts:
Ancienchateau · 03/04/2016 10:29

Is there someone you are still in contact with who is passing on info? It's very difficult for them not to find you unless you are completely cut off from everyone who is related to or friends with your NC er and then there are still ways for the determined in my paranoid opinion.

MrsBertMacklin · 03/04/2016 10:36

Hi chateau; no, he's definitely found me online, the letter makes specific references to sentences in my profile.

One of the joys about DF is that he is so unpleasant, he was cut off by all our extended family (or vice versa) by the time I reached my mid-teens, so there are no other ties on my end that would be passing back details.

OP posts:
Zaurak · 03/04/2016 11:59

You can report this to 101. Two incidents of unwanted contact is all they need now I think. Perhaps they would have a word with him? Once they have , if he continues to stalk you he can be done for harassment.

My sympathies- my bloody father managed to track me down even though I'd moved countries and changed my name. Persistent bastard...

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