How I wish my friend loved himself and could find love

[wildmountainheather]

My friend has seen me through so many hard times. He was there when I split from my DH and held my hand through awful times. When I was ready he introduced me to some of his friends. It didn't work out, but I knew and have also known he cared. He didnt have an easy young life and hasn't found love himself. As I gently point put loving himself would be a start. He has depression although he is tackling it. He thinks women don't find him attractive but they really would, some of them anyway, if he could get over the low selfesteem. Anyway this Valentines Day I want to know if there is someone( yourself maybe) you wish love for as I wish it for him.

That's a shame. It's true that, unfortunately, people with low self-esteem are more likely to be vulnerable to someone who will treat them poorly, as if they don't love themselves they'll think nobody else will and they might put up with some really poor treatment (although anyone can be ground down over time).

Can you help him get involved in some hobbies? Ideally exercise type ones, which may boost his confidence?

Don't link it to Valentines Day though - that's just a nonsense!

Part of the problem is, ironically as I have pointed out in common with many women who have low self esteem he filters out the many positives about himself and only sees the negatives. Plus he always thinks he doesnt deserve whatever praise he gets at work and that he is about to be found out. He can draw the positives out of anyone and make you feel better but sadly not himself.