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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

What would you suggest a woman to do if her former boyfriend doesn't want to leave the house?

7 replies

Chandra · 17/12/2006 00:35

My friend was in this relationship but things have deteriorated greatly and she asked him to leave the house a few weeks ago but so far no joy.
He is extremely jealous to the point of following her around if she is seeing friends, he is even jealous of her seeing her family and even complained when she went abroad to be with her father when he was dieing. He beats her cats which is a huge ofense as she is a bit short of being an animal activist, and many other things, in some of those arguments they have ended up hiting each other.
They bought a house together, although I don't know how much he has contributed to, as the house is in her name, and apart of a laptop and his clothes everything else in the house belongs to her. She offered to buy him out of the house but he doesn't want to leave, is there anything you would suggest? I mentioned about going to the CAB or ringing women's aid, and yeah, changing the locks but... he has broken the door in the past to get in... any advice?

OP posts:
Original poster
Chandra · 17/12/2006 00:35

And no, it is NOT me, I might have my problems but I can't have cats around

OP posts:
dara · 17/12/2006 00:37

Call the police and ask to speak to teh domestic violence unit. The house is hers and she has the right to live in it and he doesn't. But it may take a while to get him to go, unless she tells police he's been hitting her and then changes the locks and gets an injunction to keep him away. Nasty situation. Sympathies.

HumphreyCushiONtheFirstNoel · 17/12/2006 00:38

Would the police be able to advise her? If she's asked him to leave, and the house is in her name, but he's broken the door down, would the police be able to act on that perhaps?
Certainly sounds like she needs to speak to a solicitor about the legal aspects.

Original poster
Chandra · 17/12/2006 00:48

I told her that my neighbour's ex broke a door in the house and several other things and neighbour called the police. He was ordered not to get near the house or inside it even when they were married and the house belonged top him... guess friend was in a better position than my neighbour but wanted to point her in the right direction.

OP posts:
Original poster
Chandra · 17/12/2006 01:19

...

OP posts:
JennyLeevesmilkandcookiesforSa · 17/12/2006 01:55

She is going to need legal advice to do it properly , hope she gets him out I think it must be awful situation

smartiepartie · 17/12/2006 15:16

police, and a solicitor (many will give 1/2 hour free advice as a 'taster'). Quickly.

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