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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Is it just me or has it gone a bit tits up on here?

23 replies

donajimena · 11/12/2015 22:10

A thread that went 'poof' which I know I am not supposed to talk about had some hideous name calling on and another one now where the OP has posted is also being subjected to a roasting.
Ok ok its just the internet and anyone can post but I am just a bit taken aback at the vitriol.
This isn't AIBU (people get advised to move threads from AIBU for the 'support' you get in relationships)
Or am I just over analysing?

OP posts:
M48294Y · 11/12/2015 22:12

Most Mumsnet users look at a broad range of Topics. When you mean "on here" do you mean Relationships or Mumsnet generally?

Original poster
donajimena · 11/12/2015 22:14

Relationships. Its been very unpleasant of late.

OP posts:
IamlovedbyG · 11/12/2015 22:18

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firesidechat · 11/12/2015 22:21

Relationships and AIBU has more than it's fair share of trolls. It makes posters wary, defensive and suspicious. I'm fairly sure that's where a lot of the "rudeness" comes from.

Personally I work on the basis that 50% of threads are fantasy. It's not a nice feeling.

Not sure which threads you mean though op, so can't be specific.

IamlovedbyG · 11/12/2015 22:23

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Original poster
donajimena · 11/12/2015 22:25

I get that fireside but unless its glaring I work on the basis that it just may be genuine.
If my spidey senses are ablaze I report

Am I allowed to mention the one that is running?

OP posts:
IamlovedbyG · 11/12/2015 22:27

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firesidechat · 11/12/2015 22:28

However if you mean the shirt thread, that definitely needed to go. The op was getting nothing from it. Some posters were feeding her distress and those were the ones she was listening to. She wasn't listening to anyone else offering an alternative opinion. I know she didn't have to, but it was painful to see and helped no one, least of all the op.

She was either a troll or someone in deep mental distress. Either way, mn is no place for her, although I wish her well and hope she gets the help she needs.

firesidechat · 11/12/2015 22:31

By that I don't mean that we don't sympathise and care for people who are suffering mentally. I just mean that we are rarely equipped to deal with it sensitively and frankly some posters are beyond our ability to help.

Havalina1 · 11/12/2015 22:34

Can I ask, what ever happened to the thread by Binders and her husband? Was that removed? When I search in the app it's gone.

Oh I was reading the shirt thread. I hadn't realised it got removed.

CFSsucks · 11/12/2015 22:34

I've posted occasionally on here. After a couple of absolute roastings and a lot of unpleasantness I refuse to start a thread in Relationships ever again. One had a poster start a thread in site stuff because of the unpleasantness in one of my threads. It's disgusting.

IamlovedbyG · 11/12/2015 22:34

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IamlovedbyG · 11/12/2015 22:36

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firesidechat · 11/12/2015 22:38

I'm not your love.

Original poster
donajimena · 11/12/2015 22:38

Well I can't find the other thread now
I thought for one horrible moment it might be in AIBU after all and I have made a bit of a tit of myself but I can't find it there either Blush
I guess there will always be trolls that start threads and reply to threads but I was really shocked at some of the posts and I have been here years.

OP posts:
Original poster
donajimena · 11/12/2015 22:45

I had an absolute lambasting by a regular seemingly lovely poster under my previous NN thankfully she was in the minority.
However I did not experience the pile in and name calling that they have had.
Pack mentality?

OP posts:
firesidechat · 11/12/2015 22:45

I agree some of the posts were overstepping and not helping the situation. Sadly it does happen and it's a worry that the internet makes us less kind to each other. I've started a handful of threads on mn, but I would never start one in relationships or aibu, just in case a keyboard warrior turned up and annihilated me.

firesidechat · 11/12/2015 22:47

It's hard to say without knowing which threads exactly.

IamlovedbyG · 11/12/2015 22:47

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firesidechat · 11/12/2015 22:53

But some threads will trigger a strong reaction and similar opinions by their very nature. Not everything is a pack mentality, although I have seen it happen.

Some trolls are also skilled at knowing which subjects will provoke a strong response and run to 20 pages.

(I'm not saying that thread was one of them.)

springydaffs · 11/12/2015 22:56

I can totally trump that.

I recently wandered over to AIBU, after a break off some months, and immediately got into the swing of being acerbic straight to the point - and to my complete surprise the thread ERUPTED! 'How RUDE!' posters, one after the other, were exclaiming in horror.

The whole place had gone all kind and polite! Xmas Shock

I scuttled back to cosy Relationships - and lots of vileness going on!

IT'S LIKE AIBU AND RELATIONSHIPS HAVE CHANGED PLACES < gasp >

firesidechat · 11/12/2015 22:59

My last comment before I disappear is that trolls and posters who are rude for the sake of it have ruined parts of mn to some extent. Much safer on food/recipes and the Archers thread

Original poster
donajimena · 11/12/2015 23:03

Oh I wish I could find the other thread!
I'm sure it all kicked off on a christmas craft thread once!

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