My husband don't want me around :(

[rubolina88]

Hi everyone,

Probably it's not a big problem bit I really feel sad after my husband told me that he don't want me to go at the event that he is organising.
I'm in maternity leave and my baby is now 3 months and w moved recently out from london in a small town with not a lot to do, so my and my little jj we are always here at home alone while my husband is going to work and train (he is a dancer and youth worker).He is now organising an event where I helped him, starting from creating the flyer, all the advertisement and much more.yesterday he told me that is better if I'm not coming at the event.
I can't understand why :(

Er.. I think you deserve a proper reason from him. Not just 'it is better' if you don't come. I'm a bit shocked. What possible reason could be good enough?

I think he should be proud that you want to come out and support him.

Well...he told me that its his first event and he want to be focus on it...like I'm a baby to take care of!

Is it a social event or work event? If he is working, it is fair enough to not want you there.

If it is a social thing, or something where partners are invited, it seems out of order.

Is the event socially related?

Just go anyway? He's not your keeper.

Is he nervous about it being successful?

I still think you should be invited , maybe reassure him that you will fine and he won't need to worry about you .You understand that his priorities will be making the event a success.
Can you offer to do something to help ? a small task help serve drinks maybe or take toys and help entertain other people's children.

Perhaps he is worried about going well and concerned that you and your beautiful baby will just be too distracting for him!?

Thanks for your replies :)
He is the organiser of the dance auditions event...so I guess is a social event...I just wanted to be tgere and support him and help him just in case he needs it...and it's happened already in the past.

Tell him you're going, he can't stop you and it sounds like you could do with a change of scenery.

Would you take the baby if you went or would you be able too get someone to babysit?

It might be a nice opportunity for you to get out as you're not getting out much. I think you should tell him you're going!

*be able to

I wanted to leave jj with my sis in law,and yesterday I asked him...what you think if we leaving jj with your sis?so I can help you better and he replied...well probably is better if you staying home...my heart just collapsed in that moment.
I don't know if I need to just go...I don't want to be like I'm forcing something

Yeah, that's hurtful, especially as you've had a big input with the publicity etc. I think I'd tell him I'm hurt and ask him to explain exactly why it would be "better".

He doesn't want you to come to his work? He isn't there socialising by the sound of it- he is at work?

Or is this something that he is doing on a voluntary basis?

OP, I think it's very odd that an event that you helped organise is being forbidden to you by your husband. You are an adult and can do as you please so I think you should go the event because it might be quite revealing.

So he wanted your help to set it all up but doesn't want to share the credit? I wouldn't be helping him again in future.

I can understand where he's coming from. When I am anxious about something I have to do, I much prefer to fly solo. It's not that I don't love my friends or partner, its more that I need to focus on my own behaviour and interactions without worrying about someone else being there....

I'd ask him why he thought it was better you didn't go with him.