Husband watches 'teenage' porn

[chloworm]

I've always known my husband watches porn online, and after chatting to my friends, know that it's something virtually all men do. But recently he's been accessing porn on a daily basis (I look on his laptop). It's not just the frequency that has made me upset, but the content. It always seems to be 'teen' this and 'teenage' that. I could probably cope if it wasn't always focused on very young women. We have a daughter and in a few years she'll be the same age as these women. He knows how strongly I feel about the exploitation of women and how young women are often preyed upon by older men who should know better. I find it repulsive and depressing. I'm starting to age, have had 2 children and my body shape couldn't be further from the cartoonish figures of the porn women. Our sex life has dwindled, but that is common when a couple has children and we both work long hours. I believe that sex in a loving marriage should be respectful and tender, and I won't do things that the porn women do...anal, weird positions...it would make me feel like a whore and I won't do it simply to 'spice things up'. This whole teenage business has totally put me off and I have zero sex drive now. My husband is so quiet and I just know he won't want to talk about it, but should I insist we do talk? Do men view this online version of sex as 'normal' and think their wives should do the weird stuff? I wish it was like the 70s when the only porn around was on the top shelf and much, much tamer!

Offred, well, I'm glad you got out. But not everyone's experience is identical to yours. That's the point.

No hatred here, just tired of wincing every time I click on a thread - particularly Relationships - and the same poster is poleaxing anyone who has the temerity to disagree with her.

I'm saying she says the same thing, aggressively, in every case.

Do you think those it doesn't work for will come out and say so? Stick their head above the parapet for the predictable outpouring of poison? I don't.

Not "sisterly" now I'm gipping .. I've been following this thread and think that maybe you've been through a similar situation sml and maybe you're bitter ? Or something. I just can't figure out why you feel so strongly about defending the op's partners use of (highly disgusting) porn. You also seem a bit jealous (perhaps of certain posters relationships that do not involve any porn use) I read mn regularly but rarely post, but thought I would this time - because I'm a big fan of AF and have to say I agree with most if not all of what she says. And I'd like to think the insults you have directed at her do not deter her from giving further advice on here.
I'm sure the op has disappeared now but as others have said - breaking up a marriage won't hurt the children, but staying in a shitty one will. One of the kids walking in on their dad watching teenagers f**ked in every orifice will most certainly.
I stuck by a porn addict for 6 years. Teen was his favourite category. It has affected subsequent relationships and still affects me today (am constantly "scared" that my oh might be looking at porn) this subject has been done time and time again but looking back at my relationship I felt so sorry for the guy. I still do now, more than ever because I know he's still that way and always will be.
I think more and more people are opening their eyes and realising what porn can actually do to a relationship I.e destroy it. In the end I felt disgusted by my ex because every time I slept with him I had this image of him with his pants around his ankles with porn on a screen in front of him - it was such a turn off. And what I cannot understand is how the majority of men seem to think using porn makes them some kind of hot stud - if only they could see themselves in the act!!
Anyway I'll stop before I start rambling..

Think what I'm trying to say is, sml if you don't like what AF or others say, why not just leave the thread. Maybe shut the computer down, perhaps go outside and maybe err you know - interact with some real people.

Not trying to imply you're a cave dweller or anything ... But you do sound like one. ;-)

Agree porn can be hugely damaging. Sorry to hear your experiences. I've repeated my (pretty harmless) objections often enough now so won't trot them out again, and offered advice to the OP.

Speaking of you, OP, I'm sorry for being instrumental in hijacking your thread. Hope you can either get the situation resolved or find the strength to leave. Good luck.

I hate porn, that makes me a man hater now?

Well thanks for letting me know, I'll get rid of my DP of 17 years and kick my son out too. Me and DD can go live in a man hating commune sticking pins in our male effigies.

It doesn't make you a man hater. The industry wants you to think that way, however. That way women shuffle around all paranoid full of hatred of ourselves and other women. Society is doing a brilliant job at pitting ourselves against one another, so we don't notice those at the top rubbing their hands together at our expense. But that could be said for a lot of industries, not just porn.

No, it doesn't make you a man hater. Oh god. If it's not a straight up attack post, it's one putting words in my mouth. I've never even implied half this stuff!

Sensible discussion, anyone?

Didn't think so.

Are you implying there are no man-haters - anywhere - who perhaps would not be the best people to dole out relationship advice? Because I suspect there are lots of women - on MN and IRL - who secretly despise their husbands (and quite probably men in general) but married them because they wanted children.

But that's another thread....OP, your husband has a taste - at least in his fantasies - for young girls. He needs confronting about that at the very least. I just am afraid that no defence on his part would ever be convincing enough for me to stay. How can he possibly excuse his lust for someone your daughter's age?

I don't understand why you are making someone else's post about your personal dislike of a particular poster....

I'm sure there are many haters love, with a site this size, the odds are surely in favour of that.

I don't see one man hater on this thread.

I see at least one poster who demonstrably doesn't like women, if their posting style is anything to go buy.

And who is that LoveAndHate ?

My dear Anyfucker, I am fine..now. I worked with an amazing organization that provides support for sex workers and anyone who has been exploited or trafficked. Unfortunately, 5 young women I knew when I was working are dead or missing. They are gone, just gone. They mattered to me,they mattered to someone, they were not just tits and cunts to be used and tossed aside. A man called me a cumdumpster once. A guess I'd rather be a cumdumpster than a person unable to look at other's without compassion.
Porn destroys people on the inside and out.

Are you okay chloworm?

Have you spoken to your husband?

Oh SilverNightFairy, I'm so sorry you went through that.

That man should be ashamed of himself, I doubt he will be he should be.

I am sorry you experienced that, Silver. Thank God there are organisations that help young women and men to escape that lifestyle.

It's not just the men viewing, though, is it?

Silver, how incredible your story is and how warped some members of our society.

Love if you are referring to Any fucker you couldn't be more wrong. I'm not one of the regular posters or lick arses but I've been here 8 years and in that time I've not seen one person on here, not one, stick up for women as much as she has. She isn't saying ltb, she is telling the poster she is worth more than a sex less relationship with a daily porn user. How can anyone be against that?

76% of men watch porn on the internet. 72% believe their porn viewing has no negative impact on their sex lives.

Do you see? Three out of four men use internet porn. Should all 76% of mners leave the eastwards? It's terrifying, though, that the OP's husband watches girls his daughter's age having sex.

Eastwards should be bastards!