CSA....

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Can someone explain about the csa?

I receive no regular money from my child's father. Initially we did a strict 50/50 shared parenting, with his parents looking after my daughter as he was unable to. This broke down.

I really missed my daughter and do not want a 50/50 arrangement.

I would rather have 5 days for me and them him and his parents see her on the other days. I don't want to push him into having my daughter for monetary reasons when he doesn't want to have her.

I want my daughter more than I want any money from him but we are struggling for cash. He was financially abusive when we were together.

He really doesn't want me to involve the csa but I don't want to be begging money off him any more. I don't want to have anything to do with him.

Of course he doesn't want you to involve the CSA! He knows he's liable to give you far more money than he does at present! It's a long time since I had dealings with them, but a friend of mine has been looking into it recently as she has the same problem as you (x2, they have twins). I understand they are called something different now - sorry, can't remember what - and that they immediately take 20% of what the xp/errant parent is liable to pay. You obviously get the rest for DD. If the agreement was 50:50, who is receiving child benefit, you or xp?

I get child benefit, working and child tax credits.

He wanted me to lie on some paperwork about him providing money but I refused to.

I'm worried about upsetting him as he can be a right arXXXole...

He was abusive and I'm not fond of that side of him being a problem again.
I reported to the police but didn't take it further. I don't have any real evidence against him anyway.

I think I need to have some money off him as we are struggling on my wages. He basically splashes his cash about whilst we only just get by, month to month. I'd like to do nice things with her to without the constant penny pinching.

He and his family are quite powerful figures. They pretty much call the shots.

I'm scared they will try to take my daughter off me. They were able to do something similar in the past with another relative.

Thanks Redannie.

I'm so worried going for cm will push him towards the 50/50 arrangement again.

I don't know most of his details - I know his address, birthday, nino possibly. I have no idea of his salary. He is on the birth certificate - I don't know if he returned it. He has her passport.

OP I had to get the CMO involved as my XH is an entitled twat rather difficult and thought that the laws of the land didn't apply to him. The CMO people were lovely, and threatened with him an attachment to earnings before he cooperated. We're now on Collect and Pay, so he's paying 20% extra a month for being an uncooperative idiot. I think I lose about £5 a week, and a friend rightly observed that it was worth losing that just to piss XH off . Seriously, the CMO was really helpful. It's a bit embarrassing having to talk to a stranger about such personal stuff, but they were very understanding.

No idea why the lines have set themselves out like that!

Oh, they didn't Must be something to do with previewing before I post

I really missed my daughter and do not want a 50/50 arrangement.

I understand what you are saying but be careful with statements like this though. Arrangements should be about what is right for your DC not you.

If he did go for contact through court statements like this would be picked up upon.

You've said the 50/50 arrangement you had with him broke down. What contact does he have with dd and how old is she?

just a question...Why was he unable to look after his daughter?

How old is your DD?