Should I reply to this nasty message?

[sanityforlunch]

I met a man a few times several months ago but called it off as I have a lot going on at the moment. He contacted me on Facebook recently to ask if I wanted to meet up for a 'friendly coffee.' He was so nice about it I said ok.

As the dc are off school for the summer I couldn't find any free time so said, let's make it in September. He said, fine, you're worth waiting for, can we keep in touch.

My phone has been pinging all weekend, how's you, what you up to, etc. Every time he messaged my heart sank. So I sent a nice message yesterday saying, sorry can we leave it after all, I wish you all the best.

Last night he sent me a long message saying, why did you change your mind, how can you be sooooo busy you can't see me, you're a horrible despicable excuse for a human being and I've had a lucky escape, you don't deserve good wishes...

I am actually quite upset by it. I blocked his number and haven't responded. I really want to say something but worried it will become a slanging match. Shall I respond or leave it?

I wouldn't give him he satisfaction of replying.

do the happy dance OP - you dodged a bullet while wasting minimal time on a nasty loser.

Block, delete, ignore, celebrate!

I would personally leave it and forget all about him. Don't give him the satisfaction of seeing you're riled.

True! thanks that makes me feel better.

My advice would be to leave it. I think any communication from you now would result in another avalanche of texts and calls then abuse when it didn't get him anywhere. He sounds a bit stalkerish, best left very much alone.

I would be tempted to say something like "Clearly it's me who has had the lucky escape, you fucking weirdo." and then block any further contact!

Sounds like he was rather fond of you, has some emotional issues or both. Is there a point replying to someone who behaves in such an irrational way? It will fan the flames and achieve nothing.

totally ignore and thank God you escaped!!

Haha! Would love to do that.

Leave it, it will probably annoy him even more if you ignore it anyway.

But, yes, leaving it is probably the more sensilbe thing to do!

Your silence will annoy him more, I had an experience like this recently.

Does he have your address?

Yes - totally ignore.
That will irritate him enormously.

Leave it.

If it makes you feel better, I think there is a website full of similar evilness from men being rejected when online dating. I saw it posted on here once - maybe worth googling for it (sorry don't have it myself) so you can see this isn't uncommon.

Someone else may have the link.

Leave it. If you respond you will seem affected. I know you are but don't let him the satisfaction of knowing you are!

If you reply, he'll probably apologise and be charming and full of compliments to you. And then you may go back to thinking that because he's nice you'll give him a bit of your time...

Far better to ignore. And celebrate!

Nothing you say will be as powerful as radio silence.
Congratulations, you have spared yourself a whole load of grief!

Thanks I want to call him everything but will restrain myself.

Yes, ignoring him is the most sensible policy. However I probably would have texted him back saying "this message is a perfect example of why I didn't like you/want to go out", then block him!

Do not fan any flames here.

Leave well alone.

Lol, I've never responded to a 'how's you ?', message. Leaves me cold as so uninspiring. If someone can't be more imaginative and personalised the why bother!

#byefilipe on Twitter (I think this is what a PP was referring to). Stunning how abusive rejected men can become.

You dodged a clear bullet OP, good instincts.

He wants a reaction, any kind of reaction from you. Do not respond. Just block.

What an idiot!

Those messages on byefilipe are shocking! And they have the photos of the vile men.