lying about smoking on a dating profile

[JupiterGentlefly]

I've been seeing a guy who I met on a dating site who stated he didn't smoke. It is clear that he does
It's obvious from the pile of ash by the back door and the fact I can bloody smell it on him! The thing is that I also fibbed as at the time I was trying to quit and I didn't want to date a smoker (hypocrisy eh?). I felt that at that time if I did date a non smoker that might give me the push I needed. That was my logic. Meeting a decent person was my priority and I also thought that me being a smoker would put people off . Anyway I didn't really put any effort into the dating and I did quit but I do vape.
Anyway I did get back into the OLD met a nice guy and told him on the first date about the vaping which he was cool about.
The thing is I have asked him about the smoking and he is adamant he doesn't. It actually doesn't bother me that much at all. I even explained why I stated I didn't smoke (due to the quitting etc) in the hope that he might feel comfortable enough to come clean but no he is not fessing up. So my dilemma is what else can he lie about (but then I did too) but more so the fact that he won't come clean. Any thoughts on this?

Shameless bump

That was a rapid name change !!

You know two things about this man. 1. He is a smoker. 2. He is a liar. You say you don't want to date a smoker and liars make terrible boyfriends. For a start he must think you are stupid.

Its one of five feck

Actually you know THREE things about this man:

1 - He is a smoker
2 - He is a liar
3 - He thinks you are stupid

3 must be the case if he continues to insist that he does not smoke, when you know he does.

Maybe it's his wife (who he hasn't mentioned) who is the heavy smoker!

Could explain the pile of ash and the smell.

I would stop seeing him now, not because of the smoking but the lying.

Have you told him that you don't believe him?

Does he have a house mate? Or somebody who visits regularly? I went around to my mum's for 15 minutes on Friday. I then went straight to a friend and she was like, "Jesus Christ, you smell like an ashtray!! Have you started smoking?"

Nope. Just spent 15 minutes at my smoker mother's house.

Why not mention it again saying if he doesn't smoke then how come you can smell smoke on him?

I must admit I've done this. My dating profile 3 months ago stated that I smoked occasionally, which I did, about 3 a week. Started dating someone, then shortly after that I quit (New Year). That finished mid-Feb, and unfortunately I hit the ciggies big time due to misery. Now smoke more like 3 an hour!! I'm chatting with someone atm, who has said that to be honest, and a little blunt he has never dated a smoker. I have blatantly lied to him and told him I am a 3 a week smoker. I figure I'll cross that bridge when I come to it, hopefully it'll give me the impetus to quit (again). So I have a bit of sympathy with this guy, sorry. That said, if I meet this potential date, and end up not quitting, I won't lie about it I don't think

You may have symapthy with him Waltzing but, if you showed up on a date stinking of cigarettes, would you still persist in trying to make out you were a non smoker? Or would you regard that as insulting your date's intelligence?

You barely know him and it sounds exhausting already. So much drama! So much mystery! Is he smoking? Is he not? Who knows!

I've stopped seeing guys for less than that tbh.

No Cog I wouldn't. I have sympathy for his initial profile stating he was a non-smoker, we can all be a bit optimistic about these things, but no I wouldn't keep up the pretense in the face of blatantly obvious indications otherwise . My date is next weekend, so fingers crossed I'll have quit by then, I've only been a heavyish smoker over the past couple of weeks, shouldn't be too difficult, I hope.

Hmmm food for thought. I lied too though. I did give up. I might not have. But I know how much it stinks and if I had been for a sneaky puff and he had picked up on it I wouldn't have had the brass neck to deny it hence therefore my dilemma.. I initially fibbed but wouldn't have carried on doing so.
Hoot its not that much drama. I've been through worse. Perhaps I should have entitled my thread' why did you fib on your dating profile'? I don't mind someone nipping out for a quick fag. But I would hate to be with someone chonging away on 20 a day... I guess thats double standards though yet my former boyfriend was ok with me having a few at the end of the night but he wouldn't have liked it if I had been a 20 a dayer

token he had one hanging out of the bathroom window whilst I was there. You can't hide it!