When I was pregnant with DS1, ExP made all the right noises: he would be there to support me, wanted to cut the cord, couldn't wait to meet the baby....all that jazz.
The reality was somewhat different. We had barely arrived at the labour room when ExP turned to the midwife and (cringe!) asked if there was anywhere he could buy cigarettes. MW gently pointed out that there was nowhere on the premises as this was, um, a hospital and that as the nearest shops were about a mile away, he surely wouldn't want to be gone that lo.....
She didn't even get to finish the sentence before ExP was out the door, calling "Seeya!" over his shoulder to me.
He returned about an hour later. Now please bear in mind that my waters had broken shortly after breakfast and it was now late afternoon, so apart from a bowl of cereal, I had had nothing to eat and was stuck with ice chips until DS1 deigned to put in an appearance. Understand then my disgust and impotent fury when he waltzed back into the room, flopped down in a chair and produced a can of Coke and a Dairy Milk, which he proceeded to wolf down right in front of me, complaining the whole time about how hot it was and how he hadn't been able to get anything more substantial to eat!
His finest hour came in the immediate run up to the birth - I didn't have an epidural andtheonly thing that alleviated the pain was having the small of my back rubbed. To hear him, you'd have thought he was the one giving birth! Oh Christ, he just couldn't go on, his hand was cramping up, it was agony...the heat was unbearable, it was giving him a headache.... The MW, aka my new best friend, made a sound suspiciously like a snort, brushed ExP aside and, without a word, took over back rubbing duties until DS1 emerged.
I understand that plenty of man are supportive partners and loving dads, but are a bit useless in medical-type situations, or struggle initially to bond with a newborn who only seems to want its mother. I get it. However, ExP's performance was entirely in line with his usual character, which is why he became an ex before DS1 had taken his first steps.