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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

narcissitic mothers

4 replies

smoochyxxl · 08/11/2014 20:09

After an awakening iam now aware now in my forties that my mother has npd and my father was a enabler for my mother.my father had drink problems.i have been my mothers scape goat since at a young age when i look back and put the pieces of the jig saw together it all makes sense. Iam treated differently and don't the same respect as the rest of the family siblings have been taught to view me as less than as well.to add insult to injury me and my siblings signed my mothers will for me to find out a day later tha my narc mother made younger siblings golden boy executors of the will apparently two siblings knew what was in the will! Sums up the way scape goats are treated any body else have same problem?

OP posts:
PoppyWearer · 08/11/2014 20:13

I think lots of us have experience of this, you are in good company!

From what I've read, control of money/wills/inheritance is classic narcissist/enabler behaviour.

I've decided not to give a shit about any of the inheritance/money stuff.

smoochyxxl · 08/11/2014 20:29

Poppy wearer i was angry at the time as siblings didnt seem to give a shit like nothing happened including narc mother i dont bother with them months at a time

OP posts:
InnocenceAndExperience · 08/11/2014 20:32

Wills cause no end of problems in lots of families.

FolkGirl · 09/11/2014 08:55

I'm nc with my mother. She used her Will as a control tool, too.

She was forever amending it to write my brother or me in/out of it. Or at least threatening to - ddon't know how often she did actually do it. A lot of it was designed to cause trouble between my brother and me. We agreed to split it equally if it ever came to it because whoever was in favour at the time would have had more to do with luck than judgement. She got wise to that, though, and started just cutting one of us out and giving that propirtion to random people/charity so that if we shared we'd be reducing our own inheritance.

Now we are nc, I don't give it a second thought, tbh. The piece of mind I have without her, and the safety of my children is worth a half a house.

Sfep back from it and just ignore. It's the sadness and the upaet that is hard. Not the money.

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