Absolutely fuming at ex...again!

[MoonshineWashingLine]

I'm not being unreasonable here am I? Long story short, ex and his mother drove dd (nearly 3) home without a car seat. He sat her on his knee while his mother drove. He put her life at risk as far as I'm concerned and it has erased any small amount of trust I had left in the man.
I told him he couldn't see her this week as I need time to think about the whole thing. He has (expectedly) kicked off about it but I'm holding my ground at the moment as I'm in the middle of moving house and I don't need any more stress. I don't want him to never ever see her but how can I hand my dd over to this incompetent fool of a father without worrying about her safety?
Last week he was going through my bins and now this... getting very fed up with it all now.

YANBU
It would have been better for her to have been on her own in an adult seat belt, or even without, than on an adults lap.

Is there anyone he will listen to? His Mum will? If this is likely to happen again can you ask the police for advice? (101)

He's irresponsible.

Stand your ground and record it for later ammunition.

The child should never be put at risk because 'it was too hard/much of a hassle'.

No car seat = no taking DD. No compromise on that!

As far as the future, if you feel you can't trust him to use a car seat 100% of the time perhaps meetings could be arranged within walking distance or he could see her at yours (if that's within the realm of possibility!). Otherwise, he's SOL as far as I'm concerned.

It's astounding to me that there are still people who don't 'get' the need for car seats!

Is it even legal to drive with a young child NOT in a car seat? If it isn't legal, there's your argument.