New relationship and he can't perform

[DissatisfiedDeirdre]

I've met someone a couple of months ago who is lovely, gorgeous, sexy, wonderful etc.

We have tried to have sex a couple of times and it's been a disaster. He doesn't get fully hard, loses his erection during intercourse and can't ejaculate. He has put this down to having had too much to drink on the occasions we've tried to have sex but I don't think this is really the problem. He doesn't seem to realise he's not fully erect so I think he's possibly always had this problem. I can hardly tell him what other penis' feel like though.

He takes citalopram which I think is probably the main cause of his sex issues.

I could really fall in love with him but I don't want to be in a sexless relationship. He is staying over tonight and although I'm really looking forward to spending the evening with him and sharing a bed I am dreading the sex part.

The kissing and touching is lovely, but it either leads nowhere and we go to sleep (and I feel frustrated) or we have 10 minutes of thrusting, apologising and then awkwardness. I am being sensitive but it is obvious that he feels under pressure to perform and I feel frustrated, which are both making the problem worse probably.

We don't just do penetrative sex but I can't climax with him because I don't feel turned on while he is so obviously not aroused.

I've suggested seeing his GP which didn't go down too well.

It's a bit harsh to end a relationship for this reason especially when everything else is so good. It's a problem for me though and as far as I can tell it's not much of a big issue for him.

Just sat and read the whole entire thread before going to bed.

OP, congrats on getting rid!

izzy and tallwivglasses..Im abit in love with you both

"I sympathetically told him that our sex drives are unmatched." - Love it :o You rock.

Come back to London! We like sex here (realise that sounds like I am inviting you to have sex with me but honestly I am not, am a straight woman)!

Wow fantastic episode, lori put well and truly on her place by Andrea and great scenes with rick and Shane, this second half of the series is turning out to be fab, I really thought for a minute that rick would actually leave Shane !

Gosh what happened there thought I was posting on telly addicts

From the male perspective... move flat.. go back to London because you have found yourself in a soap opera.

as for his shot comings...

I love this thread!
Deidre, I know you moved from London, but did you move to a much smaller, back water, inbred little place by any chance?
Your thread sounds exactly like my life since I moved from a big city to my current tiny craphole.
It;s weird - the men are total cunts to the women...but THE WOMEN KEEP COMING BACK FOR MORE! It;s all about "families" here. Nobody has an ounce of self respect. I'm doing my best to move away - if you associate with scummers, you become one. And I have done somet hings Im really not proud of.
Hope you mange to keep out of micro-penis's way. Dickhead!
x

When Deirdre revealed that he's Porche-less got a pushbike, she reminded me of a twat man who used to cycle to my local hostelry clad in lurid lime green lycra and prance around the bar displaying his chipolata and 2 button mushrooms meat and two veg with his helmet under his arm

Oh you lot do make me laugh

It is a soap opera round here. I'm surprised I'm not getting faces in every other post.

More things to laugh at:

Mr Floppy doesn't know the alphabet. He said he does know it but not the whole way to the end. [creases up]
He has a selection of Adidas tracksuit bottoms and grey hoodies and nothing else. Doesn't even own a pair of jeans
He lives with his mother. Doesn't even have his own bedroom. He sleeps on the sofa with the dogs [snort]
He is especially proud of the fact he was once almost tasered
He has home brew tattoos and wants to get a professional one done with my name on it. My reaction: ummm, no. PLEASE NO it would be cuntish in the extreme to permanently brand yourself with my name when you haven't even managed to properly fuck me yet
He's unemployed
He likes River Dance and sometimes goes to Bingo with his mates
He's not an alcoholic (yeah, right) but yesterday he was drinking beer upstairs at 10am
He gets competitive with his mates about how many times he's been arrested.

Oh God! How could I have ever felt I was falling in love with this moron.

He is the most sophisticated of all his friends though. One of them walks around with a stick and wears steel toe cap boots all the time in case he gets picked on. Another one keeps setting rockets off on my doorstep in the middle of the night to scare the living daylights out of me make me laugh. They are total cunts.

There are lots of wolef fleece clad women here [sniggers]. I came home with a M&S carrier bag recently and was questioned suspiciously about what I'd bought and how I could afford it. I'd bought a pack of knickers - they were £7 for 5 pairs I think. Hardly Posh Spice levels of extravagance.

I think I continually torment them with my confusing London ways. Mr Floppy was excited that I could rewind live TV . He said something like "so I can go for a piss and come back and watch what I missed?". I nodded very slowly.

They do this thing called 'drop calling' each other. In order to preserve the credit on their PAYG phones they have a system where so many rings means it's time to meet up. They think I'm rich because I wait for the call to be answered and then speak to whoever I'm calling. It baffles them that I sometimes have more than £2 with me and don't feel compelled to buy lager with it.

Thing is, these people aren't poor. They have far more money than I do because they are all dodgy. But they spend it on alcohol utter crap.

I have decided to try and move. I really don't like it here anymore.

Oh FlushtheToilet, I am playing that very loud right now. Mr Floppy is no doubt upstairs drinking. My windows are open and so are upstairs'.

What a complete unable to fuckwit!

Yes, glastocat.

I don't know what you ever saw in him, Deidre.

You have made me laugh so many times reading this thread and to think you could have ended up with this gimp is truly depressing.

Am so glad you have seen him for what he is and are considering moving. They sound like a bunch of utter morons.

Bluebelle, I don't know what I saw in him. I think it was the bad boy thing

Exp was always sooooo fucking serious and miserable. This one was different. You know, relaxed and able to amuse me. He is good looking too. Lovely, lovely eyes that make my knees buckle. He made me feel about 14 again and it was great for a few months. Feel like such a kid for admitting this, but my heart used to beat really fast when he touched me. So very embarrassing now.

Thing is, and I was always thinking I could never really introduce him to my friends and family. They would rip the piss out of me.

I wish I'd have had a good shag out of all this nonsense.

Fuck me, I can hear "Duelling Banjos" playing whilst I read your description of him. OP you've dodged that bullet...

Right, off to London now to spend time with normal, sexually functioning people.

I'm genuinely glad that a lot of you have laughed at this thread. I'm not sad about what's happened. I had a period of anger and humiliation and you've all helped me to laugh it off and hold my head up high.

I have packed condoms and if there's only one hot blooded male in London tonight he's in for a good one

I just can't see why you were interested in him to start with, OP. Was it just that where you live he was a prince amongst men? If so, never mind what your child thinks, get yourself back to civilisation immediately!

I was going to shout (kindly) you need to move! But I see you've already come to that conclusion. Thank god.
On the plus side, you describe them so well you could write a book about your experiences and become the next female David Sedaris. Win!

wow op! what a catch! i would play the stones 'i cant get no satisfaction' whenever you know he is upstairs.....

hope you had a rather better night in London!

Good choice Vic

Ha ha haaa

Didn't pull last night, but what the hell. I had a great night out with normal people.

London is a fucking great city. No-one cares who you're shagging there because people have sex lives of their own to think about.

I've no idea where Mr Floppy is tonight. He and his pervy faced mates behave themselves on Sunday nights until exp has returned DS and left. He doesn't turn up until 9pm, by which time I'll be in my pyjamas and ready for bed. They are terrified of exp because he's bigger than them I haven't told them that he's not violent or jealous because it quite suits me for them to think he might be

oh dear, they're very predictable aren't they

Glad you had a good night.

get outta there!

In the meantime, write a memoir novel?

I posted a comment earlier on another thread about the same sort of thing.It really is an waste of time with some guys, I should know ,just got myself out of a similar set up.Be warned DD,these things happen in threes!. I've had great sex for years with a selection of fine men ,then lately picked a few duds. One guy said he preferred porn ,actually,. Another was only interested in my rear end. .I can be a sensitive woman so tried a few times with these losers.I felt like a (sex) therapist , and had to give up in despair.The latest dud left me crying with frustration, he had other good qualities tho, so I hung in there for a few extra weeks ,despite general floppiness.He said one night in bed that having sex with him was like the lottery, you never knew if it would pay off.How true, I dumped him on another pretext the next day.I wish I had the guts to tell these guys that what they are presenting to me is definitely not a hard on. .And please when I say don't put it there ,I mean it .

i say dont take any prisoners..dump directly if he disappoints!

Ohh, I could tallwivglasses. Wouldn't be very steamy though would it?

notverywisewoman it's funny you should say that about anal sex. It seems to be a common theme with men who can't perform adequately. The suggestion was raised here a couple of times as well and I didn't know whether to hit him or collapse in laughter. I don't do anal, but I'd imagine you'd need a partner with a full erection to do it!??!

I wonder if these pathetic men are kidding themselves that it's us with the problem. We're not sexy or adventurous enough for them to get fully aroused or something. They know they can't get it up with a real woman so porn becomes their sex lives and they start confusing fantasy with reality. Mr Floppy said several times that if we had anal I'd be screaming 'I'm coming, I'm coming" . I've never done it but surely that's not very realistic or likely to be something he's experienced personally . Sounds way too pornified to me.

As for having sex with him being like playing the lottery Dickless fool!