New relationship and he can't perform

[DissatisfiedDeirdre]

I've met someone a couple of months ago who is lovely, gorgeous, sexy, wonderful etc.

We have tried to have sex a couple of times and it's been a disaster. He doesn't get fully hard, loses his erection during intercourse and can't ejaculate. He has put this down to having had too much to drink on the occasions we've tried to have sex but I don't think this is really the problem. He doesn't seem to realise he's not fully erect so I think he's possibly always had this problem. I can hardly tell him what other penis' feel like though.

He takes citalopram which I think is probably the main cause of his sex issues.

I could really fall in love with him but I don't want to be in a sexless relationship. He is staying over tonight and although I'm really looking forward to spending the evening with him and sharing a bed I am dreading the sex part.

The kissing and touching is lovely, but it either leads nowhere and we go to sleep (and I feel frustrated) or we have 10 minutes of thrusting, apologising and then awkwardness. I am being sensitive but it is obvious that he feels under pressure to perform and I feel frustrated, which are both making the problem worse probably.

We don't just do penetrative sex but I can't climax with him because I don't feel turned on while he is so obviously not aroused.

I've suggested seeing his GP which didn't go down too well.

It's a bit harsh to end a relationship for this reason especially when everything else is so good. It's a problem for me though and as far as I can tell it's not much of a big issue for him.

haha something2say!!

After he's slagged you off to all and sundry his mates, you're going to see him let him into your home

That'll be a BIGGGGG MISTAKE, honey.

Sounds like Deirdre is desperate to show off her new 'do'.

Place your bets now for another non shag of the century

5/1 they try to get it on
10/1 they succeed in getting it off

I don't think the floppy chipolata will be getting an airing.

Most of what this bloke knows about sex probably comes from porn - hence his problem with pubes, probably has a lot to do with him not being able to perform along with the meds and the drink.

Sorry it has all turned out such a disappointment for you. Do your best to distance yourself from them and I'm sure some better friends will come along.

20/1 she knees him in his non existent bollocks....

If Deirdre's absorbed anything by osmosis from this thread, the odds on her kneeing him should be evens, Vic.

one can only hope....

Where the hell is this place that you live?!

I was just wondering that myself, PooPoo.

Are you living somewhere not too far from the Chatsworth council Estate, Deirdre?

I know, it kind of makes me think of that TV show Melrose Place :)

Nah, it's Shameless that comes to mind

Hang on, his friend said 'watch that one he's told us what you are like in bed' - I would read that as his friend trying to wind you up, tease you. Men don't talk about sex very much at all, let alone problems. Thats women

hmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Many men talk about sex a lot when there are no women within earshot, Betty, but because they invaribaly make out they're 5 times a night superstuds they tend not to mention minor problems such as not being able to get it up to their mates

3 minutes past midnight? I reckon Deirdre's new do has been given an airing

My DH was like this the first few times , i think he felt under alot of pressure to perform and hadnt had a relationship for a long time . It all worked fine once he felt more relaxed in our relationship .

Deidre, WHAT HAPPENED? I think we're all crossing our legs for you

25/1 Mr Floppy popped a V got it up and Deirdre's proposed to him on carpet burned bended knee.

Ohhhh God, I am very embarrassed by some of the above posts. But I have really laughed as well.

OK, this is what happened.

He came round, said he was really, really very sorry and told me he's stopped taking his citalopram. We had a long talk (I bollocked him for a very long time). I told him he mustn't just come off them like that and that he HAD to see his GP, which got me absolutely nowhere.

I kept asking why he'd discussed me like he did with his mate. He said he was showing off and had had too much to drink. He wanted his friends to be impressed that he had a woman that was gagging for it with him.

This is the bit where I should say that I booted him in the nuts and showed him the door.

We kissed, made up and went to bed. No sex as I was on my period (I'm sure he was relieved). He told me he loves me and wants to be with me. I told him I didn't know how I felt, that it was too early, too many problems.

He's coming round tomorrow night for a few hours (won't be staying because DS will be here) with a Chinese and a bottle of wine so we can talk more.

I've let the sisterhood down haven't I?

I still want to be with him even though he's made such a fool of me. He's done what I wanted him to do wrt his meds. I mean I'd have rather he speak to his doctor first, but at least he is showing that it does matter to him. It's the sex talk that I'm finding it hard to forgive. A lot of posters don't seem to think it was that bad though.

I still haven't made up my mind about what to do. Please don't pile in and have a go at me. I know I'm a twat.

You're not a twat. These choices are yours and yours alone. I just cannot believe that you would get back with someone that a) You don't even fancy really - and b) Someone that would tell your friends that you hadn't shaved your bikini line.

I'm stunned tbh. That doesn't happen to me often. Good luck though!