to tell Dh if nothing is sorted, not to bother coming home from work tomorrow?

[welshbyrd]

On-going situation, here is a previous thread www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonabl e/1114037-I-do-not-know-what-to-do-here
Since then, have spoken to DH, opened the thread for him to see, and told him, Im deadly serious about considering divorce.He said he understands, and would read thread.

I went upstairs to give him time to read thread about 10.30ish, read amg and feel asleep waiting for him. Though I did hear him coming into bedroom and getting into bed about 1am ish.

This happened Saturday night, his mum come to visit Sunday [she lives 100 miles away], so could not talk then, but she left 6.30pm, and since then he has not even mentioned it at all
He went back to work from Christmas today, he has come home stuffed his face with food I cooked for him, helped put DCs to bed [back in school tomorrow] Now he has gone upstairs to listen to footie on the radio

AIBU to tell him tonight, we either sort this out tonight, which involves him talking it through, or he should not come back from work tomorrow. Its so frustrating, and is really getting me down now
I feel as if I going to extremes, with this idea, its completely out of character for me to be so nasty, [am aware telling do not bother coming back is nasty], but I can not cope anymore. I really do not think I can live like this another minute, its come to the point of me seeing images of me ripping handfuls of hair out of my head, have even imagined, him walking into house and me being in livingroom covered in blood wrists slashed[ would never do it, but just the shock might make him realise what this is doing to me]
For him to know how much this is hurting me, the very fact he has ignored it, [always listens to me though, but never says what he wants], has made me come to the conclusion, that he could not give a fook whats happens, or how sad I am.

He knows Ive been sad about this for months, not just the issue of lack of affection, the very fact he does not care about me enough to even be honest.

Its like he has kept me hanging on a thread for almost a year, knowing it is hurting me

Rabbling now sorry, do not even know if any of this makes sense

Homeboy - his coldness, lack of affection stopped about month after DD was born

Isore - perhaps I am vulnerable, Im happy we spoke, made progress even, [ this problem has driven me nuts for almost a year, even if he had of wanted to split, I still think I would have been relieved [not that we had split] but that the situation had stopped

Proundandscarymary -Did not have suicidal thoughts, imagined images of extreme behaviour, as said in post, just trying to think of ways to shock him into realising what not talking had done to me

To put it bluntly, I felt like I was in a stone room, no doors, and was kicking, banging, etc to get through the wall, if that makes any sense. The divorce suggestion, was basically a ladder leading straight of of the room, I hope this makes sense

My orignal post was about lack of affection etc, the REAL problem was his lack of communication. I felt he had me dangled by a thread, and would not let me know either way, if we split, or we work at it etc
The not knowing drove me insane, more than the issue

Agreed haveanewjung - he is emotional stunted, but he gave in last night, first time ever, its good start

Keep working at communication issues welsh, maybe don't let problems build up unresolved for too long is the key. Good luck, glad things have turned a corner.