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Pushchairs

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Original poster

Has anyone forced a pram on their baby?

43 replies

Tiredmama94 · 02/10/2023 13:16

I have a 3 month old who is very fussy. So far he has hated every mode of transport apart from sling (pram with carrycot, normal pram facing in, facing out, with and without cost insert) and the car seat. He also hates napping by himself I think he just loves being held. So far the slings have been our best friends. This week as he has been getting more alert he has started fussing and crying in the sling. Now he will only let me carry him in my arms facing outward. It’s the issue that he wants to see but hates not being on me hence why he’s now refusing the sling. I think the pram would be perfect for him (and me!) but he won’t accept it. He will be able to sleep and look around whenever he wants.

my question is simple: has anyone tried just leaving them to cry in the pram till they get used to it??

and before people pull in with the “it’s torture to let your baby cry” pls don’t. My question is very specific for people that have tried letting them cry. DS will cry for 10 mins sleep for 30 at home and then go back to screaming. He’s too young to be forward facing in the sling (our pram can be used from birth in non carry cot and also he’s a large baby with good head control!). I’m currently stuck at home I can’t go and socialise I can’t even take the dog for a walk. He’s not uncomfortable doesn’t have wind or anything as the moment I pick him up he’s fine. He is just fussy. But after 3 months I now need my life back and to be able to leave the house with him for an hour. Pls help if anyone has tried to just let them cry for a while - do they eventually get used to it?? Or even after days of trying no luck?

thank you all!!

OP posts:
bridgetjonesmassivepants · 02/10/2023 14:03

Didn't persevere with the buggy as mine wouldn't go in it either. It's not what you want to hear, but I carried mine in a baby Bjorn until he was about 13 months and then he walked everywhere. I looked weird with a massive toddler strapped to my chest.

Never got to use the beautiful buggy my mum bought me

Caspianberg · 02/10/2023 14:03

Yes. Mine hated being out down. After 2 months I bought a sheepskin liner for carrycot. And just put baby in and walked. After about 5-10 mins he calmed down and liked it. Also put carrycot hood down so he could see the trees in park if not too sunny.
He liked the pram eventually.

I couldn’t cope with him being attached 24/7, even with him liking pram eventually he still was held most the other 23hrs

PurpleBananaSmoothie · 02/10/2023 14:12

Putting them in the pram and them crying but you being there isn’t leaving them to cry. You have to get on with stuff, you put them in the pram and they cry but you keep pushing and saying soothing things and check they are OK. He might stop, he might not so I would probably start with a 10 minute walk just because them constantly crying is a bit hard on the nerves.

There’s been a few times when I’ve just had to keep pushing the pram no matter how upset DD was. It’s usually easier to sort whatever is wrong when you get to where you’re going. Or now DD is a toddler she’ll scream and cry in the pram because we’ve left the park or the bird has flown away or I brought the wrong book with me or I won’t give her another banana from the bunch I’ve just bought after she has literally just had one. You will not be the only person pushing a screaming baby muttering soothing nothingness to yourself.

Octobermeterreadtime · 02/10/2023 14:14

Grab the baby, the dog, the pram and earbuds... And leave the house.. Even if your dc is 'your world' <cringe > yabu to accept being held hostage by a dc.

OppsUpsSide · 02/10/2023 14:16

One of mine wouldn’t go in her pram, ever. I couldn’t take her anywhere, and when she got older (but still a baby) she was like a Houdini getting out of it.
Cant you put him in the sling but facing outwards?

ChristopherTalken · 02/10/2023 14:45

I had a massive pram hater. Headphones, honestly. Have them facing you so they can see you, talk to them for reassurance etc, but sometimes they just HAVE to go in the pram. Its easier when they are babies, it gets tricker when they get bigger and start planking on you so you cant strap them in.
DD hit 2.5 and suddenly all she WANTED was the pram......

ChristopherTalken · 02/10/2023 14:46

Also you probably havent noticed but on any given day now I see at least one baby losing their ever-loving shit in a pram. It feels like the whole world is watching you, they arent!

ZombieBoob · 02/10/2023 15:01

My wee one was like yours hated it from the word go. He's 8 months now and will do 1 hour possibly hour and a half but with bribes so a snack then he's happy will occasionally sleep on the school run now too. I just kept persevering little and often building it up. Really turned a corner now that he can have a snack and drink while in there

Mariposista · 02/10/2023 15:06

Yes, sorry but yes. We have things to do and places to go. DOn't make a rod for your own back and be held hostage by a baby. All this 'he won't go in' - sorry, but you are the adult, what is a 3 month old going to do? Climb out?

BungleandGeorge · 02/10/2023 15:11

Have you tried putting a hot water bottle in the pram first to warm it up? Sometimes it’s going on cold that’s the problem. You can also get sleeping bags with holes for straps so you could transfer him in all tucked up? I think a few short walks is fine but I’d gradually build up. You could also get a baby carrier that faces outwards although not for dog walks in case they pull you over!

DuploTrain · 02/10/2023 15:15

Does your car seat attach to the pram? That’s a nice compromise sometimes because they are sitting up but still cosy.

But to answer the question, yes I did take my DS out in the pram crying. It was either rock him to sleep crying in my arms for 15 minutes or push him around crying in the pram for 15 minutes.

Hopefully he will get used to it after a while - get him some nice shiny or crinkly pram toys to clip on as well.

BungleandGeorge · 02/10/2023 15:18

Meant to say obviously remove hot water bottle before putting baby in!

Original poster
Tiredmama94 · 02/10/2023 16:09

Thank you all honestly you’ve given me strength. I feel like nowadays saying you’ve let your baby cry is like a cardinal sin…

to be honest I had made my peace that I’ll have to carry him until he can walk but the last few days when he also started refusing the sling (crying) I thought right that’s enough. Tomorrow he may decide that he wont cry only if we grew some wings and flew him everywhere 😂😂 enough is enough damn it!

responses to a few people his pram has a gorgeous liner it’s so freaking cosy (wish I could trade places with him…). He also hates the car seat we tried using that and he screamed. He’s also too young for forward facing sling once he’s old enough I definitely will try that hopefully he starts liking it again. I also still let him contact nap and am happy to carry him so it’s not like I want him to never be with me, just want an hour walk a day is that too much to ask? These little buggers are tough 😂😂

again thank you all for your responses and suggestions. Will keep trying the pram on short trips and if he cries he cries. Fingers crossed he slowly gets more amenable to it and I can have some peace ✌🏽

OP posts:
DuploTrain · 02/10/2023 16:14

It is really hard OP.

In a very very tiny way it was almost easier that my DS cried all the time regardless of what I did because I never had the guilt of “making him cry” because he spent most of the time crying anyway. Sleep training was certainly much more palatable for me than for people who weren’t used to their baby crying.

Happy to report that my DS is a very cheerful toddler now though, it does get easier.

CornedBeef451 · 02/10/2023 16:14

Sometimes you just have to do it.

DS would sometimes scream all the way to school and back in the pushchair but I didn't have a choice, DD had to get to school!

Eventually he gave in and when he was a bit bigger we could negotiate pushchair on the way to school but he could walk home, which took 40 mins instead of 10.

43ontherocksporfavor · 02/10/2023 16:17

He’s 3 months old, you decide what transport works. Get him checked physically to make sure there’s no reason he can’t lie down if you’re concerned. How does he sleep in his cot?

Toddler101 · 02/10/2023 16:20

Octobermeterreadtime · 02/10/2023 14:14

Grab the baby, the dog, the pram and earbuds... And leave the house.. Even if your dc is 'your world' <cringe > yabu to accept being held hostage by a dc.

Agree.

It's what anyone with more than one child does, too!

allfurcoatnoknickers · 02/10/2023 16:23

My 3 month old hates lying flat in the pram because she couldn't see out! She gets on much better now she's 5 months old and can sit up.

Maybe try the car seat like PP suggested?

Also, it's not leaving them to cry if you're right there. Plus if you have more than one kid, there is absolutely going to be a time when they're both screaming and you need to pick one to tend to...and I tend to go for the mobile one rather than the baby.

Original poster
Tiredmama94 · 02/10/2023 16:26

yes he sleeps in his cot ok especially at night it’s the one area where he’s better than I was imagining early on so it’s not a lying down issue. The days are just long with him - he’s so particular!! I even made a bunch of mum friends from antenatal classes and now feel isolated even there as all the activities they partake in I can’t because he screams constantly 😪

OP posts:
Caspianberg · 02/10/2023 16:27

People criticise for everything. Don’t worry about it.

I see people on here moan about ‘ mothers ignoring children in pram on phone’.
And I think, that’s literally the only thing I could do to calm myself at 3 months when baby had been up every hour feeding for months and wouldn’t be put down. Mothers need time to breathe

I would change and feed baby at home, plonk in carrycot, and slowly walk him around the block whilst I listened to audiobook 20mins. He often would scream 5-10mins. But then would fall asleep, I could walk home, and hopefully it gave me 30 mins at home to actually wee without holding baby, sort laundry, prep some food, or whatever without baby in sling or arms.

sunlover1123 · 02/10/2023 16:33

Tiredmama94 · 02/10/2023 13:16

I have a 3 month old who is very fussy. So far he has hated every mode of transport apart from sling (pram with carrycot, normal pram facing in, facing out, with and without cost insert) and the car seat. He also hates napping by himself I think he just loves being held. So far the slings have been our best friends. This week as he has been getting more alert he has started fussing and crying in the sling. Now he will only let me carry him in my arms facing outward. It’s the issue that he wants to see but hates not being on me hence why he’s now refusing the sling. I think the pram would be perfect for him (and me!) but he won’t accept it. He will be able to sleep and look around whenever he wants.

my question is simple: has anyone tried just leaving them to cry in the pram till they get used to it??

and before people pull in with the “it’s torture to let your baby cry” pls don’t. My question is very specific for people that have tried letting them cry. DS will cry for 10 mins sleep for 30 at home and then go back to screaming. He’s too young to be forward facing in the sling (our pram can be used from birth in non carry cot and also he’s a large baby with good head control!). I’m currently stuck at home I can’t go and socialise I can’t even take the dog for a walk. He’s not uncomfortable doesn’t have wind or anything as the moment I pick him up he’s fine. He is just fussy. But after 3 months I now need my life back and to be able to leave the house with him for an hour. Pls help if anyone has tried to just let them cry for a while - do they eventually get used to it?? Or even after days of trying no luck?

thank you all!!

We have a reflux baby who hates the sling, pram and bassinet thing. We put the car seat attachment and got him used to car journeys and so once he was used to that he seemed to enjoy the car seat (still screamed though) about the same time as you I lost my shit and thought enough was enough. Parked up at our favourite park, fed him, made sure he was clean and then put him in the car seat for a walk. He cried for the first 10 minutes and then fell asleep.... after the initial red faced tantrum he seemed to just stop doing it and enjoy the walks!

We've tried the pram (ours is from 0 as well) and he treats it like the enemy so for now we've let him win that battle. When he gets full head control he will be put in it again and I'll do the same thing I did in the park! We bought a nice sheepskin thing for it and I think because of the reflux he just doesn't like to be laid down.

They go through so many phases so you have my sympathies!

Shiremum40 · 02/10/2023 16:34

Yes!! Was recovering from a c-section and couldn't carry. Firstly, put in carry cot and got on with it. Then at about 8 weeks I moved the pushchair inside and put her in it in the day time. I moved it around and she watched me. It took a week or 2, then she was fine. Good luck.

Lilac14 · 02/10/2023 16:38

My DD also hated the pram when she was little. She basically hated not being on me for the first 7 months. I always tried her in the pram but took the carrier everywhere I went so I could babywear.
In time, she actually began to like the pram. Especially as she got older and went in the seat part. She is 1 now and is usually great in the pram, and I don't need to take the carrier everywhere I go now 🤣 Hopefully it will get better for you in time, too.

Original poster
Tiredmama94 · 02/10/2023 16:38

@sunlover1123 thank you. Enough is enough was what I had yesterday. At some point you just can’t keep going when they hate everything. It’s like… pick something!! Thanks for your message though helps knowing I’m not alone. I swear I have so much envy seeing mums push these happy babies in their prams like why can’t this be my life!! Gos forbid I try to get a coffee or get some lunch 😂😂

OP posts:
ColonelSpondleClagnut · 02/10/2023 16:43

Yep. Don't worry - been there and done that. The first one is the hardest, by the time I got to baby number 3 they were plonked in whatever and wheeled wherever as we had stuff and places to go!

Having said that, I also had a high needs baby who didn't want to be put down, and got good at doing different sling carries. I appreciate they're small now, but doing a side or back carry could be helpful when they're a a bit bigger so they can look around more?