Having regrets over deciding to move

[Iloveitalianfoodyum]

Hi everyone.

I am having regrets about deciding to move. It’s all going through - I have found a house and had my offer accepted and have sold my house.

but now I’m regretting the whole thing as we get close to talking about completion dates and exchanging I am in a bit of a panic.

i love the house I am in right now it is just high maintenance being a Victorian house and that maintainence was the catalyst to moving. I am moving for practical reasons not because I am wanting to move if that makes sense? The new house is only 5 years old and is very low maintenance and has a garage etc and is detached but is smaller. It is a nice house on a lovely road.

has anyone done this and it has worked out? Does anyone else regret deciding to move? Would love to hear your experiences.

i have asked myself how I would feel if the whole chain fell apart and I was staying here and I would be disappointed I’ll admit that but the thought of saying goodbye to this house is making me feel very sad 🙁

Like you we are downsizing due to the maintenance issues, however my physical ability is the reason, I just cant and more to the point want to do the jobs anymore. Unlike you we cant find anywhere we like, we have had 3 months conveyancing to find something but nothing. We are now having to go into rental which is another faff. All this stress is making me question if it was worth it. We could potentially be in rental for a while as the market here has dried up. Then the thought of having to conveyance again is daunting. Everyone saying its exciting and going to change our lives, we will look back and think its worth it but in the midst of it thats questionable. We have alot to be thankful for, we will be cash buyers, got rid of the mortgage but at this mo all I feel is sad and unsettled. Like you its fear of the unknown. When we moved here 15yrs ago, it was a brand new area and community. Can't remember feeling nervous or anxious about it. Must have moving =stress. Once you move in with your own furniture and bits, it will feel home. As I say its your family that makes it your home not the bricks and mortar. Think of all the benefits of taking on a smaller property with less maintenance and the money saved to spend on holidays.

We have just done it.

Left behind a very high maintenance 1860's built old miners cottage with outbuildings and a large high maintenance garden and downsized to a 2 bed modern newer bungalow.

NO regrets whatsoever. In fact, having the pressure off keeping the house heated, maintained, keeping an eye on damp and condensation, dehumidifying to keep levels maintained feels wonderful!!

No more spending hours at the weekend weeding, mowing and trimming hedges. Our new garden is much much easier and takes a fraction of the time to maintain.

New house is more insulated and warmer and just all round much easier to clean and take care of.

I LOVED my old house and its charms but its great to be able to take a step back from all the maintenance and care it required to keep an old house 'healthy' and have a much easier life.

So no, no regrets here whatsoever and I have loved making the new house my home and feel 100% happy and settled here and have not once looked back. Even when I convinced myself that I would constantly do so. I haven't.

There’s no doubt that larger older houses are going to be expensive in terms of maintenance and upkeep. People speak of new(er) builds as though they are cramped unpleasant boxes and that may be true of some, but certainly not all.

As you age, maintenance that was once easy becomes more difficult, climbing ladders, diy, gardening etc. Cleaning and maintenance drains energy too.

It’s always going to be hard to leave a well loved home, but its easier to live in a well insulated, easy to clean and maintain property.

I've never liked my current house as much as I do since we put it on the market! Every day, i find myself thinking this or that is nice, convenient, roomy, works well, etc.

We're upsizing (age 59 and 68). For me, that's ok but I'm having horrible jitters about my partner's age and limitations which I can't talk to him about. The move is funded by his inheritance so don't I feel able to change our plans, which is 40miles from where we live currently so I'm losing all that's familiar and safe.

I do like the look of our new place but, honestly, my mind is constantly whirring trying to work out what will go where, what'll need doing, finding new doctors, dog groomer and sitter, etc, etc. I seem to have lost all my excitement about the move and replaced it with worry.

If our buyer pulled out tomorrow, I'd be ok with that. I'm hoping this will all change once we get through the tortuous buying and selling process, which is sending me a bit insane 🤣

@2longinthetooth I’m sorry you haven’t found anything suitable yet. I think I would be just like you if there was a period of having to move into a rental property. That is quite a faff but then at least when you see the perfect place you are in the best position possible. I know that doesn’t help now because of the fear of the unknown like you say. At least you have secured a buyer and so all the maintenance is going to be a thing of the past soon. I am indeed very much looking forward to having spare cash. For the last umpteen years all my spare money has gone into the house and it will be really nice to be able to spend it on holidays!

@ErlingHaalandsManBun thank you for your post it is most reassuring. I am the same with the garden and this summer especially it has been constant weeding and that is for the front, the back and the side garden. I can’t wait for the insulation either and am planning to put up solar panels as the back of the house faces south. When I look back at the photos taken in this house especially the ones taken at Christmas with the ornate fireplaces and large bay windows it is rather magical but the living in it part is not like that. The damp! The chill! The dreading gale force winds! I won’t miss that.

@Buscobel thank you for your encouraging post indeed the new house is actually nice and it actually has 4 double bedrooms on the first floor instead of 3 doubles and a single like I have now so that will make my daughter happy at least.

@KrankyKumquat it sounds like you have a lovely problem of moving to a lovely large house but it does sound like you’ll miss where you live now with regards to location. True you will need to set up new doctors etc but do you have any other ties to where you live now?