Feeling fed up and need a talking to

[Badvocthebad]

Hi 👋
We live a nice 3 bed detached house. The area has changed a lot since we moved here 15 years ago and the reasons we moved here are no longer applicable (schooling)
So much warehousbejng built and new housing estates but with no more infrastructure. Its already a nightmare wrt drs surgery.
We are hoping to hsve paid off the mortgage early next year and will also get a small inheritance (enough to pay moving costs)
I really want to move. Dh doesn't - or at least not yet.
I'd like to move to the next county and have better access to drs and shops etc.
Am I selfish? Should we stay put?
It's making me really sad 😔

It is really depressing that so many towns are expanding without the infrastructure to back it up and I totally see why you want to move. But do you have good reason to think that the same thing won't happen in the next county along? It seems to be happening everywhere.
If you do move, my feeling is that it's better to find a house with a proper garden and some space round it, fairly close to the town centre, in an area that can't be developed, or has already been developed. Not that that solves the problem with lack of GPs and hospital care, but it makes the spread of estates around you less immediately obvious.
This may sound like a selfish way of looking at things, I don't know, but I can't see that you and me living somewhere we dislike helps anyone else.

Where do we move to, to escape the shitification of all the nice places?! Isn’t everywhere being systematically wrecked? Move to a nice area… ooh, good, there’s tons of new residents arriving so the whole place changes… but at least we have lots of barbers and chicken shops.

Thanks both.
I do worry that if we moved somewhere else that could change too.
I'm not against change per se, but there must be proper infrastructure.
2 local primary schools have closed recently and still no 6th form for local kids.
It's so frustrating.
Ideally we'd like a house with some land so at least that would be safe from construction

I'm in a similar situation. Place opposite is looking at developing and it'll really be shit for us (not housing, but increased noise and will feel intrusive).
I wasn't planning on moving because we can see the end of the mortgage. It feels likei we are being pushed out.

Moving is so bloody expensive too, a sideways move will put us in debt for many more years

Yes, the stamp duty on top of moving costs is a huge cost. I feel pushed out too, and it’s just not realistic for me to move to a remote detached property to escape encroachment. So for time being I’m staying put and I keep wondering, is there anywhere that won’t be spoiled?! If there is, it will be unaffordable!

What are your DH’s reasons for not moving and what does he mean by not yet?

In the meantime can you upgrade yor life in anyway? Is there a nicer town that’s a bit further that you could start going to as your regular go to place etc?

It's horrendously expensive isnt it?
And dh and I can't diy it moving house like we used to so we'd need a proper removals firm which are £££
I've got a couple of plans house wise (desperately need a new shower for example)
Dh just HATES change (whereas I thrive on it..)
He's right it would cost £££ and be very stressful but I do think age wise there's a window to make big moves and once it's gone thats it.
Ugh.

Thats a good idea

Thats the other issue - we wouldn't be downsizing, it would be a similar type of house/space.