Talk some sense into me please

[SexNamesRFab]

I've fallen in love with a house and want to put mine on the market so I can make an offer. It's a lovely house (4 bed semi, Victorian, drive, S facing garden, next to park), in a great location and with fantastic potential.

But... It would mean doubling our low mortgage (to just under x4 our salaries, we're both 40). DH likes the house but doesn't want the hassle or financial risk. Realistically, I couldn't get a mortgage until end of Jan.

So.. Please talk some sense into me. I check right move every day and am going to be gutted when it goes

I am on the same boat, age and everything, i keep looking for houses in Zoopla and Rightmove, I found one that is perfect and then another one, an another one......but realistically we can't buy l anything yet, need to get our finances together.
The thing that help me is, I don't want to struggle financially ever again. We are going through a money makeover and we are challenging our beliefs about money and property ownership.
Look into MSE forum, you can get a good insight into people's lifestyle choices, some of them take people to a life of debt and stress and other choices to financial freedom. Money issues is the cause of most of the problems in relationships.
I am also following Dave Ramsey baby steps and watching his you tube videos ( I am not a religious person so I ignore that bit) but he does talk a lot of sense.
The thing he says about a mortgage is put at least 10 -20% down, your payments shouldn't be more than 25% of your take home pay and duration of the mortgage 15 years.
There is a saying that says "what is meant for you it won't go past you".
Good luck op with whatever you decide

My husband is risk averse too :) We talked about it for months but it became clear that there was no way he'd be prepared to borrow almost 4x the income. I really, really wanted a big house. To achieve that we compromised on the area. We live in a massive house having borrowed less than 2x income (and we actually like the area too - it's just that fancy designer shops are a drive away).

I think you might be able to convince your husband to put up with the hassle but would need some stronger argument for him to take the financial risk. Are your other outgoings likely to decrease or are you likely to be earning a bit more in the near future? With the higher mortgage, would you still be able to live comfortably and save money every month?

I would be very wary right now of over stretching with mortgage debt in case of a Brexit housing market correction. I can see your husband's point.
Is your current house inadequate for your needs?

Thank you so much for your replies. I can't and don't want to talk to DH about it anymore, as I can see his point and I'm just making tension in our marriage when there doesn't need to be any (as we couldn't do anything yet even if we both agreed to).

To answer your questions.... Our house is lovely. 3 bed terrace which we've just finished extending. Maybe I'm bored and want a more aspirational project now this has come to an end? We have x2 DD and the third bedroom is quite small so will be a squeeze for DD2 when she's a teen. There isn't really an option to do the loft, as we have no turning space and live in a conservation area (so no dormers allowed). There's no drive and no option for one, again due to the conservation order. Parking can be a pain.

We (thought we) compromised on the area when we moved here (deeply unfashionable SE London suburb). In reality it's fantastic and I wouldn't move out as we've settled into schools and the community. We were very very fortunate to buy when we did, prices have gone mad since (which is making me panicky about needing to do this NOW, before they go even more crazy).

My earnings have gone up and look promising to rise even further over the next few years. But... I am a consultant and run my own business, so I walk a knife's edge.

I checked rightmove again this morning and it's bloody STC. I want to weep and wail. DH is not sympathetic.

Could you compromise on a 3bed with parking and the potential to convert the loft? That would presumably be only a tad more expensive than your current property (or maybe even the same).