An I a failure if I never own my house?

[George345]

Hi All,

I currently rent a lovely 2 bed house. Have decorated top to bottom completely made it my own! I feel like its mine but I'm worried will my children feel secure and at home being in a rented home? Any comments appreciated xxx

If you are, you won't be alone. My parents never owned either, and I don't think they were failures.

Of course not.

no of course not. in a lot of countries renting is the norm, we're kind of obsessed with owning over here i think.

my parents rented for nearly all of my childhood. think they bought their house when i was 15 or 16 and it never bothered me in the slightest

I don't own either, in my 40s, and every time I start thinking it might be feasible, the goal posts move - housing price bubble and harder rules on mortgages being the current one.

Absolutely not!!!!! As others have said it's the norm all across Europe we're just weird here.

Home ownership only every used to be for the true middle and upper class, not us working class - it's just going back to the way it was.

My parents never owned brought up 4 kids in their council house ( eye surgeon, engineer, financier, last still at uni!) they sacrificed a lot for our education and if never call them failures!

In fact I think they have done very well and we all will make sure they have a comfortable retirement!

• I would never call them failures... ^

Thanks for all your replies! I think being a mum we just want our children to have the best childhood possible and I want them to feel secure wherever we live which I'm sure they will :) I do feel a lot better now thank you all! Can I ask if there are any people that are still renting now even though there children have moved out got there own life's? As like I said I can't see us ever being able to 'own' but I am happy renting as I make it my own wherever I love :) xxx

It's not the renting per se but the difference in security between social renting where you have security and private renting where you don't.

No I will never own my own home ,I have a council flat, its 'mine' till I die so children have a secure home and have added oldest to the tenancy just in case.

I agree but if you find a long rent, normally you got what it says on the tin as it costs the landlord money to get new people in etc... Unless something comes up and they have to sell for whatever reasons!! Also with private renting I like that i could live in areas I could NEVER EVER afford to buy in :) xxx

No, I actually think paying for the roof over your head for 25/30 years isn't exactly intelligent. Housing prices are sky high (and have been for years) as they are controlled by the rich restricting supply and importing migrants. Add to that the huge amounts of interest you pay and it demonstrates that working your whole life for your house just makes you a slave to the system.

It's not the renting per se but the difference in security between social renting where you have security and private renting where you don't.

^
This. The main reason I would like to be able to buy is because I think I would feel more secure. The only reason the bank would chuck you out is if you don't pay the mortgage. A landlord can just give you notice or not renew your tenancy.

I may as well pay my own mortgage, as I'm paying the mortgage on this in terms of rent. I just haven't ever managed to save enough for a deposit.

Because renting is affordable!!! They also tend to downsize as and when.

No I do not feel this makes you a failure.

Avoir Everyone has to pay for a roof over their heads whether via affordable housing/private rent or mortgage. If you are paying out you may as well work towards owning a property where possible.

A lot of private renters that I know have similar/higher monthly payments than those who have mortgages.

Well, not everyone Rochiana54, many people either stay with their parents or other relatives, or in a home owned (or inherited) from them. I'm not saying it's how it should be, but how it is.

As other people say, renting is going to become the norm, it seems to me that it must be virtualy impossible to pay £4 to 500 and more per month ( and more in some cases! )rent, and save for a deposit as well!

you can have security for quite some time - speak to your landlord and negotiate a long lease. You are happy and he/she is happy.

There is a big difference between private renting and renting with a secure tenancy.

We privately rent. We've been doing this for about 10-years. We have owned before and sold. But, we did not buy in the late 90's - 00's boom, so we missed the boat on making a huge profit on property we did own.

I don't regret renting. We have 2-small children and have been able to rent for far cheaper than the normal mortgage costs. It has meant we have been able to put money into a pension, travel and save.

However, there are times I would prefer to own. The feeling of security is esp important now. Also, where we are now a mortgage would be the same as a rent. I am in my late 30's and do think I should probably buy in the next 10-years.

I do think it is unfair and sad that many people judge for renting. Many people I know who are my age did get help onto the housing ladder or have social housing when it was far easier to access.

You should not feel like a failure but I do understand why you would feel like one though. It is such a British thing to have and own our little bit of this island. It like from when we were born the seed is planted in us to have the strong desire to own. Mortgages are not meant for everyone but then I had a strong desire to have my own place where I would move on my own terms rather than being told to move on when im not ready. That's why I bought a house.

I live in one of those European countries where renting is the norm and have no desire at all to buy nor any notion of not being able to provide my children with a secure home. But this is because the laws that are in place here protect tenants properly. It is not easy over here to get a tenant out without a very good reason, and even if there is a good reason the landlord often has to compensate the tenant financially for the hassle/expense of moving as well as giving very considerable notice (happened last year to friends when the house they were renting was sold).

Attitudes to renting in the UK seem to me to be bound up with the lack of protection in law for tenants and their consequent vulnerability. The bizarre stigma attached to renting seems to stand in the way of badly needed changes to the law. The longer I live here, the more bonkers the whole UK culture in this regard seems, tbh.

pcardy you are very right. I guess the current law is a throwback from the 80's tenancies where a tenant could withhold rent for any small reason. That said, the current system is very wrong. Even if you are a perfect tennant it all hinges on the reasonableness of the landlord/letting agent to give you a reference for your next property. We will probably look to buy soon.

My parents moved us all over the world and rented everywhere (they bought their first house for retirement!). They raised a doctor, an English professor and a barrister in criminal law. Your kids will be secure because of a secure family, not bricks and mortar!