"I think it looks a little dull." Oh DO you, DH?? Do you REALLY! ffs

[SagaNorensLeatherTrousers]

Goddamnit.

So, DH and I have just bought a fixer-upper mid-terrace that needs a lot of TLC.

Since Day 1, DH has said he's stepping back when it comes to decorating. Ha bloody ha! They always say that, don't they?

So I have put a lot, and I mean A LOT of thought into colour schemes. Something warm, inviting, will not box in our tiny lounge, incorporates his style, my style, furniture we can't yet afford to replace, the dark wooden floors I really, really want (and persuaded him to save up for instead of the 1970's cheapo carpet he had in mind ), etc. etc.

I've spent hours on Pinterest, Houzz, and home decor blogs trying to get inspiration and insight into what we could paint our walls to turn it into the living room from which dreams are made.

I finally narrowed it down to some lovely, wispy grey Dulux colours and picked up the strips today to excitedly show DH.

His verdict? Dull.

Dull. Dull. Dull.

So, 'What did you have in mind, then?' I ask through gritted teeth. He doesn't "really know."

I explain going bold will shrink the room. Going neutral (beige, cream, taupe) is not us.

He agrees.

I show him Pinterest boards with my inspiration rooms pinned on. Bold pops of colour, floor pillows, walls with grey that look lush and fill me with glee.

Oh Christ I can't even be bothered to finish this rant. Basically he's back-peddled but the word DULL is ringing in my ears.

Back to the drawing board. Has anyone looked at grey paints lately and seen something with a blueish hue to it? I'm thinking if I can find a jazzed up grey it might conjure up a little enthusiasm on DH's behalf.

Why not set a date for him to come up with a design for you to consider alongside your plan? Then when he doesn't your one wins by default.

That is genius!

I should add I was all for us working TOGETHER on it but he's the one who insisted I have free reign. Only to then veto my shit. Annoying.

If he said he was stepping back from the decorating, then I wouldn't have even asked his opinion; it would've been presented as a done deal .

I think grey can look a bit dull mind, although I know it's the colour of the moment.

My mistake was showing him a Google image of the paint colour I like on a bare wall, which I agree makes grey look pretty dull. (Doesn't any empty room, though? )

Once I showed him the direction I want to take it he was a lot more positive. But I want him to love it. I want him to gaze at the colour sample in wonder. I want him to dance around the room with glee in feverish anticipation! Not say, "isn't it a little dull?"

Farrow and Ball Blackened is a 'bright', cool light grey with a bluish tinge in some lights. We have just painted our living room in it and it looks great. After trying lots of beigey grey testers, it just looked so much fresher.

But I love the idea of challenging him to come up with an alternative!

He evidently doesn't have 'vision' so a patch of grey paint isn't going to inspire. If he was more positive with more images I wouldn't worry about my plan, just do it.

I'm sure he will love it, but if he doesn't I think you just have to accept that home decor does not stoke his fire like it does yours and that's ok.

For an interesting grey, I would go for Aspen Silver (Dulux). We painted our living room last year and we both love it, it's a nice interesting but not ott grey-purple colour.

DH is still smug at being the one who won the argument chose it, and I have no comeback at all because I love it.

Grey looks fab - ignore him! It creates a lovely backdrop for stronger colours. Farrow and Ball's misleadingly named Lulworth White is a really nice one, though not particularly blue-tinged. Get the room painted and all the more 'exciting' accessories in and I'm sure he will dance like the awestruck glee pixie of your decorating dreams

Ooh nerdgirl thank you, that sounds promising! Will have a look. Did you find the F and B paint ok? I've heard it can be on the thin side.

Billy you are, of course, completely spot on. He actually contemplated keeping the "feature wall" of smoke-stained, old fashioned floral wallpaper because the previous owner "spent a lot on it."

Ok I'm starting a list of all these colour recs, thanks guys!

"awestruck pixie of your decorating dreams"

Is that so much to ask???!

Yes, my vision is for the wispy grey to create an interesting backdrop, apple! Will check out Lulworth White, thanks!

We used Thimble Case grey on our bedroom wall, and I love it so much I would paint every room that colour.

Another vote for F&B blackened if you want a grey with a bluish tinge. Although to be honest, I think you should strive ahead with your current scheme. He's probably just lacking vision!

I like mineral colours, then your can stick in brights at your behest with soft furnishings and accessories, plus pictures, then when you get bored with those you can change the whole colour scheme without redecorating :)

Sorry, I know that grey is very in right now, but I'm with your dh, it is dull (and how can grey be anything other than neutral?). Having said that I would be very annoyed if my dh opted out and then was unenthusiastic.

My dh is colour blind but has very strong opinions about colour. When we painted the outside of our house I think at one point we had 12 different testers up before we decided what to go with.

Sorry, nooka when I separated grey out of the neutral zone I meant I see it as an "interesting" neutral rather than a "uniform" neutral. We just lived in a rental flat for 4 years with beige walls so I am dying for something new, even if it's on trend at the moment.

But you're right, grey is neutral.

Ok off to Google the suggested colours now.

Oh I can totally understand your desire to make your home your own, and if grey looks good in your house then of course you should go for it.

I suspect we just have very different taste, as I like colour in my home, so have chosen primrose yellow, powder blue, turquoise, lilac, and terracotta in the past as well as white (I like jasmine white for a bit of warmth).

My parents have even stronger taste in colour and their rooms are/were generally known by their colour (the red room, the blue room etc) but they were big rooms with lots of light (and big furniture, lots of pictures etc). I'm sure that many visitors were a bit overwhelmed though!

Little Greene gauze mid - delicious grey with blue hues

nooka if only I could be so brave! Those colours sound lovely. I particularly love yellow and blue. I really am planning some bold accessories to add colour and warmth that way.

I am loving "Blackened" as a bluey grey so will pick up a tester of that I think, but I am REALLY impressed with Crown's greys! I like Aspen Silver though might be too purple-y? But I love some of the bolder greys like City Life and Smoulder.

Honestly. Don't seek his approval. I know from jittero experience that this does not work.

Just go ahead and do what you think will look nice.

hotcross great advice, I won't be asking him again until it's on the walls!

Crown's Blue Gravel is singing to me...anyone seen this in real life? Too dark?

Seriously see if you can check out Gauze Mid I have seen it "live" and it is absolutely beautiful. Very cheerful and uplifting as the blue in the colour was accentuated, but still vague.

I don't ask DH's advice on décor as it really is not as important to him as it is to me. I might get his view if I'm struggling but won't necessarily follow it.

And as it isn't that important to him he will comment without really studying it or thinking it through.

My DSis has a bold colour in a small room which looks great, but the room has two large sw facing windows. It's the amount of light coming in that makes all the difference.

Your mistake was asking a human with no vision or imagination.

I've painted our bright conservatory a warm grey (dulux warm pewter) - the first coat my dh was whining on and on it was too dark and that I was 'obsessed to make the house a cave'

Now the second coat is on the warm softness and purply undertones (but not purple at all just warm) have made it lighter and the pale grey tiles lighter still.

Just don't ask again.

And I have lots of sympathy with the hidden extensive research - I put 6 testers on the wall (carefully researched testers) and dh acted like I'd just gone in homebase and picked out any grey testers - he even went as far as to say he'd driven past homebase and could have popped in and picked up some testers

We went grey but I had to get rid of it. It really was dull in this house.

Grey is dull and over used I have viewed about 20 houses grey everywhere. And I have just done another refurb which is a grey fest and am living in it and I hate it.