I am pondering my decorating/furnishing mistakes (of which there are many)over the past few years....

[moondog]

and fell the urge to tell you what not to do to spare yourself my pain.

Do not use red in any but the smallest doeses. Hot, claustrophobic and sucks up what little light there is on this blighted isle.

Same goes for dark kitchens and slate floors and worktops.

I'll think of more but in the meantime, please share.

I once painted my bedroom lime green (was at university and thought it would be bright and funky ). It lasted one night before I repainted - it made everyone look sick.

grey and yellow wall. Temporary insanity at least - it lasted all of 12 hours before I overpainted the yellow.

Rag rolled in orange over yellow

Stencilled kitchen cupboards and round the top of the room

Stuck feathers to the wall

Silver stars around top of bathroom plus fish stencils

It was the 90's

I was thinking about rag rolling the other day.
Dear God.
That was reminscent of H block dirty protests wasn't it?

Grey and yellow could be rather nice, if very understated.
I'm taking it this example wasn't.

I once painted an antique chair bilious matt green and gave it a royal purple cushion.
Thought it looked fab.

My step dad painted our bedroom grey, black and white rag roll and thought lot's of black hand prints across the wall and ceiling would be a fun addition.

Instead I used to have nightmares of hands reaching out for me...

I decided in my first place that painting big thick bands of different lilac/purple shades would be calming...

My step dad painted our bedroom grey, black and white rag roll and thought lot's of black hand prints across the wall and ceiling would be a fun addition.

Instead I used to have nightmares of hands reaching out for me...

I decided in my first place that painting big thick bands of different lilac/purple shades would be calming...

DP and I went a bit mad with colour in the first house we bought - I think it was some sort of rebellion after years of living of living in magnolia rented properties.

It included a terracotta bedroom (that turned out more of a bright, dark red), a dark blue bathroom (the room was tiny so my theory was that it couldn't look any smaller...wrong!), a lime green office and a downstairs loo with a door painted with a zebra pattern .

This was in the early/mid 90s so lets hope there isn't a revival of the decor of that era!

Insane all of it.
Inhaling Earl Grey at passive aggressive 'fun' idea of black handprints.

oops - double posted sorry!

I painted the thick embossed vinyl wallpaper in my kitchen (Victorian house, huge kitchen!) with vinyl satin emulsion in a charming terracotta I'd made out of brick red and brilliant white leftovers.

I think it had just about stopped feeling sticky when I moved 3 years later!

I did not envy the new owners, not one bit, oh no

Understated was the look I was aiming for, moondog. What I got was German car factory on acid.

I think I've always been a bit wimpy and gone for very neutral: magnolia in the 90s, taupe in the noughties, greys now. Which doesn't make my house very exciting but I leave excitement to the guy we bought this house from.

When I say it was orange all through the living room and hallway, orange doesn't do it justice. It was a kind of dark fluorescent orange that I cannot believe is commercially available. It MUST have been knock-off from some dodgy firm that paints street signs or industrial waste containers or something.

For light relief, the kitchen walls and ceiling were dark yellow, the floor orange tiles, the woodwork crimson, the units wood-effect melamime. One of the bedrooms was purple with darker purple woodwork. Another was pink. Another was blue. And everywhere, throughout the house, a preponderance of orange varnished pine.

They didn't believe in curtains or blinds. They must have lit up the neighbourhood like a Christmas tree.

I can forgive the 80s its fashion. I can forgive its music. But I can't forgive its interior design.

What was worse? The paint effects - ragrolling, stippling et al? The mediterranean look (grungy orange walls)? The monochrome bachelor pad look? All the black and grey and red? Or was it those bleedin awful window treatments - all that pelmetting and flouncing and tie-backs.

Hideous. Irredeemable.

Nothing you've done can ever be as bad as my parent's house when we bought it! When we saw it in the 80's, my brother's room was a very dark brown (almost black) with violent orange cupboard doors . The rest of the house was done out in various tones of bilious green and puce, apart from the bathroom which was burnt orange, and the kitchen which was panelled in lovely orange pine. Looked like a sauna, and due to lack of ventilation when you did any cooking at all it felt like it too.

The house was also originally painted bright pink on the outside. They got told by the estate agent that they needed to paint it a neutral colour in order to get people through the door. So they chose daffodil yellow

Do not ask you husband for a nice print for the sitting room for your birthday ..cos you'll end up having to look at sunset tryptych for evermore

Oh dear.
Possibly better though than my friend's present from MIL- lovingly and expertly tapestried picture of an alsatian she was then obliged to put up.

at the cross-stitch hound.