What to expect - taster day, unprepared 9yo

[TasterDayHelp]

Ds9 has been invited for two taster days 9-4pm at a private school in January. He will be in a year 4 class.

We are from overseas, he is homeschooled, has previously only attended Reception and year 1 of a totally different sort of school (chaotic, dysfunctional state school), he has ASD and ADHD and auditory processing issues, and is really anxious about things like eating and going to the toilet in unfamiliar places. He will have no clue about how anything works or what he’s meant to do. He has food allergies and will be too scared to eat in a loud dining hall.

The school knows about the ASD/ADHD and that he is homeschooled, but I am worried.

I am dealing with a friendly admissions officer but she isn’t giving me many details. It feels like every question I ask is met with stalling.

What should he expect on a January Monday and Tuesday? How do school dinners work? When ate they allowed to go to the toilet? Does he need a pencil case, geometry set, workbook, is he expected to do PE, does he need PE clothes?

Can I send him with his own lunch to ease some of the anxiety, or would that not be allowed?

DS wantts to attend the school as it does his specialist talent (at which he is exceptional) but I think he’s not going to survive the admissions process…

I would just send him in comfortable clothes that he could do PE in. Send a packed lunch & water bottle. If he uses ear defenders put them in his bag too. Pop a pencil in his bag. He shouldn't need anything else.

They generally go to the loo at break & lunch times, if he needs to go during class put hand up and ask.

My kids loved their trial days...I hope all goes well.

They’ll assign him a buddy who can show him what to do and where to go
in my experience private schools have a very different atmosphere & the noise and chaos much much lower if at all

Ask to speak to the school SENCo about all of this - especially things like the noisy dining room and anxiety about toilets. They may well have experienced similar and have some ideas.

I’m sorry about his previous school experience, that sounds rough.

He will hopefully be assigned a buddy whose job it will be to sit with him in lessons and at lunch. They will pick someone friendly and competent! This is what happens for “tasters” at my DC’s private primary anyway. Ask if there will be a buddy for him - if so, he can ask his buddy anything that is unclear.

Also, if it would help, I’m sure it would be possible for him (and you) to have a school tour before his taster. That way it’s a familiar place and he’s seen the loos, classrooms, dining hall etc before being there for a full day.

You will probably get a email/letter the week before he is due to attend with more details but when DD did her’s she was told
to either wear comfy clothes or the uniform from her current school
to take a pencil case with essentials but nothing out of the ordinary like a geometry set
to bring packed lunch if she preferred (the school is totally nut free so we opted for a school lunch)
whether she would like to be with the class doing swimming or forest school and to bring the right ‘kit’ for the activity
As the school know about his SEN I’d expect the SENCO to be heavily involved with your DSs taster days, I’d also make sure they give him the chance to experience the thing he wants to go there for.
Wishing him good luck 😊

They will look after him. Why not ring the school and ask to speak with whoever does their pastoral care, and ask your questions? They’ll be happy to help.