DS being left behind in reception... gutted and fed up

[TitsalinaBumSquash]

After a supremely crap day i find that DS1 is being held back in Reception while 90% of his class are going to yr1 class.

Its probably becuase he has cf and has had a few weeks off, he isnt as bright as some of the others.
Before anyone jumps down my throat i know they are doing it for his own good, i know there not being mean or anything. Its just seems like some more bad news to break to him and hes going to be split up from his freinds and its just another way that bloody cf is effecting him, i have officially had enough today.

Tits

This happened to my ds and he survived. Totally understand that you feel crap though, I did at the time.

Having said that, i would say, don't assume anything. Ask the school for the SPECIFIC reasons that they have kept him in Reception. You might be surprised.

School wanted to do this with my middle son who missed alot of reception year due to a health condition.
I was very upset and worried about this and was particularly concerned about him being split up from his friends.

I went to see the Head who (luckily) was brilliant. She saw my point of view and we reached a compromise where DS would be in YR1 but would visit reception for some lessons. In practice, this meant that he was with reception class for numeracy and literacy sessions and with his year 1 class for everything else. It worked very well, he was happy and made brilliant progress.

Would this be an option for your DS do you think?

Totally understand you feeling crap but it will be Ok.

This happened to one of the DC in DS reception and Mum was upset, her DS was a severely premature baby and had some learning difficulties.

In hind sight she says it was the best thing that could've happened. He repeated reception and although he had been behind his previous classmates he was ahead of the new intake and gained a great deal of confidence. He made new friends and kept the old ones.

Hope it works out for you and your DS

Thanks everyone, i am having a week where you only have to breath near me and i blub, im feeling rather pathetic.

I suppose DS wil be ok, he is pretty upset but i know he isnt quite up there with the others, they had to choose 4-5 to split with reception so i guess it was always going to be him.
I am going to ask for specifics and voice my concerns, luckily his teachers are really lovely.
It just seems so silly that he will be 6 when he goes back to school and the majority of the class will still be 4!

I know its not but it just seem like another reason why DS is different from other children, i really wanted school to be one place where he could just be Jack and not a CF child.

It makes it worse all the pitying looks i got from the other parents in the school playground which i know is silly to take notice of but i did.

If your not happy go and speak to the school. I am an inclusion manager in a primary school and holding children back is frowned upon. It does not enable children to catch up and hinders them socially. It just masks problems storing them up for the future. It is the schools responsibility to differentiate the curriculum appropriately with the children in the correct year groups. Sometimes schools want to hold pupils back to make it easier for them rather than because it is the best thing for the children. You need to ask what will happen next year.

Sorry is he actually repeating reception year (ie will go into yr 1 in 2011 - pretty unusual IME) or is he simply doing his year 1 in a mainly FS2 class - fairly common, again IME?

If the latter, please don't think of it as holding him back. And certainly don't say that to him. It will be a major boost to his confidence if he is one of the slower learners but suddenly discovers (for example) that he can actually do the phonics the rest of the class is struggling with! And maybe he can lead the way a bit and mentor the littlies?

Does that make any sense? Sorry you are feeling so sad and I do empathise.

Personally I would complain. Contact your Parent partnership they maybe able to help. Lots of children will not be where they should be at the end of reception, but ideally they should be kept with their age group, and given extra resources. (You could quote the Disability Discrimination Act at them.)

Good luck!

Agree with Clary . This worked really well for my DS.

Is he doing Reception again, or is he in a R/Y1 composite class?