"he told me I can't play with him or the boys playing his game"

[Buddleja]

DS1 looked very sad today when I picked him up from school (he's 6), just out of the school gate he told me "X told me that I can't play with him".

He's three close friends in school and X is one of them. I asked about the other two boys and apparently they wouldn't play with him either (because they were playing with X)

This isn't the first time he's told me this, he asked me today why it's him that can't play

Any advise on how to handle it? I don't think he's been picked on or anything as big as that (no reports from teacher when I last spoke to her) but I'd like to offer him some advise!!

Kinda thought that Pixie (the pinch of salt bit) I'm trying to get him to tell me exactly what happened but it's like speaking to a brick wall!! Though they were playing catch apparently.

I told him to hold out till tomorrow and see what happens and that I would talk to teacher if the same happens

Well 'catch' is apparently what I'd have called tig (discovered this by asking whose ball is was and getting told that you don't need a ball for catch you just run around trying to catch people)

I wondering now what the story is as I know that he's reported back that he can't run as fast as the other boys

I'll wait and see now he's cheered up and was told by his little brother that "X is wude" and he meant it as he was making his cross face and had his hands on his hips as he told DS1 this

Is he a 'tell tale'? By that I mean he tells the teacher straight away if someone says something he does not like or agree with, not that there is anything wrong with what the others have done or said it;s just that he does not like it!

Also they/some can all be quite dominant about how games should be played and the rules of the game, who is playing it properly etc and some get bored of the one who is always telling the others what to do. I am not saying your DS does this but might be a reason why they are telling himn to go away. I experienced this with DS1 now 7, all part and parcel of them learning to take turns, listen to others ideas, giving everyone a fair chance.

HTH.

I also find that boys float amongst a bigger group of friends at school, they don't fall out, they just like to spread themselves further and wider amongst their peer group, then come back together quite happily.

Hmmm carocaro you could be on to something - he's a bossy so and so at home. I wonder if that's it - there shouldn't be a reason why he wouldn't try bossing at school either. Though he does tell me that X organises all the games and who plays

Not sure about the tell tale thing - his teacher didn't mention this however I do know that there was a girl would was calling him and a few others names ("smelly" and "stupid" and I asked what happened in the end and he told me that the teacher told her off as he told her what the girl said. However I'm not too sure if he'd tell on stuff he doesn't like or agree with (just the 'naughty' stuff!!)

I'm half tempted to ask X's mum or dad (I've know them since the boys were born but the boys only knew each other in school!) and I know that she wouldn't take it the wrong way - I might ask what X says about DS1 at home. I wonder if it's the the clash of the bossy boots!!!