Yr1 struggling almost six year old....

[laujs]

Hi my ds1 is nearly six and one of the oldest in his class. I'm really worried about him because he is behind all of his friends, he no longer sits with his friends at school and has to sit at the front of class with three other children that are also struggling. These children are also the youngest ones in the class...
My son is such a lovely boy and i've done my best to help him but I know last year wasn't easy emotionally for either of us as I was involved in an abusive relationship which has obviously had an effect on him, and I feel so guilty Just want him to be happy.
Anyway to the point he is still on pink books and we are re-reading the same books he had last year. He just doesn't recognise his key words all the time. Think a lot of it is a fear of failure, so he just doesn't try. I read with him every day and try to make it as fun as possible! He has 4 spellings a week to learn, which he's excellent at through his friends get about 8 to learn. Feel like his teacher judges everything based on his reading....
Any suggestions on how I can help him have more confidence in his ability??

Firstly, well done for getting out of the abusive relationship. You've made a really important change in your life and in you ds's life.
You know, as you've said, that that expereince has been difficult for him as well as for you. But don't waste time getting racked with guilt, be glad that you are now creating a safe and stable environment for your child. This is what will help him learn. Don't worry about his progress at the moment, just make sure he knows he's loved and safe and his confidence will come in time.

Thank you...I hope so.

Well done for getting out of the relationship. I agree with staroftheweek but if youcant help worrying about his school work go in and see the teacher and arrange a meeting. This will give you more of an idea of were your son is at. She may be able to give you some things to do as fun exercises at home. Try not to worry dont pressure him. Teaching a child to be confident is quite hard to do but showing you love him nop matter what and are happy with him will help a lot it will work out

laujs, honestly don't worry about his reading. Some kids get it earlier than others. It's really, really common for boys especially not to click into reading until the end of year one or even into year two. If he happily goes to school, has friends and is trying to do the activities that the teacher asks him to, then I'd say he's doing brilliantly

If he can do the spelling then the reading should follow.
If you are very concerned the school will have a literacy co-ordinator whom you can talk to.

Right now, you spending time with him is more important than him reading sucessfully.

Perhaps you could play a game with him that invloves some reading? There are a couple of Orchard games where the cards/playing tokens have simple phrases on and he may pick it up more easily in the context of a game than seeing the same book again.

Don't let his age/abilty worry you, they do all 'get it' at different times and far better he has a good grounding in the basics and can make progress from there. I've heard so many stories about kids who could't/didn't want to read at age xx and by yy they were top of the class.
Also want to say well done for getting shot of bad relationship, must have taken a lot of courage.