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Primary education

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Original poster

Sex Education at Foundation at age 5 and 6?

28 replies

Nappyzoneisabeetrootrunner · 25/06/2009 12:11

Suprisingly this week we have had a letter from dd school (she is in year 1) it said they had been running a sex education programme last year on years 5 and 6 and it was so successful they are introducong it to reception, year 1 and year 2. Topics to be discusse dare based round two kiddies in nursery who grow up together and the will learn the proper names for ther body parts. Well i am not a prude but think there is a world of differnce between age reception to yr 2 and years 5 and 6 and dont relish the thought of my dd announcing daddy has a penis and mummy a whotsit over the Family Sunday lunch - the oldies will keel over!

Has anyone elses really young uns had this chat? To me they still beleive in fairies and father xmas so why the need for this at 6 is a bit hmmm to me......

OP posts:
AMumInScotland · 25/06/2009 12:46

Do your oldies keel over when your children announce things like "daddy has a willy"?

I think it's a good age to start learning the proper names for things, and some of the basics about how bodies change as we grow up, and where babies come from.

I certainly told DS about these things around 5 or 6, so I don't see a problem with it, so long as it is handled in an age-appropriate way.

But I'd want to know how they are changing the lessons from what they aimed at 10yos, as there is a big age difference.

Original poster
Nappyzoneisabeetrootrunner · 25/06/2009 12:59

thats my main concern amuminscotland as that age jump is quite wide.

They dont keel over they stifle a giggle but i imaginne the shock value will be more prominient with real names!

I am thinking probably as its called relationchip and sex education they will touch on what is appropriate and with whom and in a loving realtionship etc.... so as kids ar more willing to talk about inappropriate things that may be happening in their lives and alert anyone if something is going on that is not right. See i am am not a prude....

OP posts:
AMumInScotland · 25/06/2009 13:17

If it's anything like my DS had, they started with topics like "looking after our bodies" and "respecting other people's bodies", which most of the children will think means not pushing people in the playground, but you're right it gives children some context for what is ok and what isn't and might get them to speak to the teacher about something worrying. There was also a lot about how "we're all the same in some ways, but all different in others and that's a nice thing".

But the best thing would be to ask the teacher how they're planning to change it for the younger ones - I'm sure they'll have tailored it ok, but there's no harm in checking what the plans are, so you won't be caught off-guard.

Callisto · 25/06/2009 13:19

My 4yo DD already calls her vulva by the correct name (ie vulva) and knows that all girls and women have the same and that Daddy has a penis (she's even seen it, gasp, shock). She has also seen our (now deceased) cockerel shagging and seen cattle bulling and knows what it is all about. The age isn't a problem as I think it is basic knowlege all children should possess and knowing the correct names for body parts is immensly important. I wouldn't want the school teaching it to DD though, but that is beacause I don't particularly want the school having anything to do with DD (planning to HE).

hercules1 · 25/06/2009 13:20

Why on earth dont you want them to know the correct names for their body parts?

DD has always known and still believes in father christmas - I'm not sure why they cant do both at the same time.

Elibean · 25/06/2009 13:32

I rather like the oldies keeling over

Mine don't, at least not any more at 'penis' than at 'willy'. I think age appropriate is very important, that some things kids aren't ready to take on (which to be fair, if they're not, they usually blank out very successfully) but whats in a name? Why is penis weirder, or less weird than willy? They're just words, not sexual acts

Equally, not sure why kids shouldn't believe in Father Christmas AND ask whether he has a penis (sort of thing my 5.5 yr old would ask quite seriously, though she keels over with giggles at the mention of 'pants' ).

listenglisten · 25/06/2009 13:37

I'd like to think that the teachers would have a bit of professional know-how that the lesson content would be different for R & Y1 than for Y5 & 6!

I think it's a good idea and my dd has been looking at topics such as 'looking after our bodies' in Reception this year.

meemarsgotabrandnewbump · 25/06/2009 13:41

I don't see any problem with it. I am currently pg and DS1 is 5. He is a very curious child and asked question after question about how the baby got there, until there was no point in making up stories, so we told him, and got an age appropriate book about sex and reproduction.

Now that he knows,it's not an issue. He doesn't go on about it all the time or show any innappropriate adult behaviour.

And he still believes in father christmas and the tooth fairy

Original poster
Nappyzoneisabeetrootrunner · 25/06/2009 13:57

lol yeah i get ya i was just emphasising their innocence. I dont have an issue with proper names though we do have willys btu we still have front bums so i suppose better sooner than later - perhaps it will make our grannies loosen up and i suppose if mil keels over its ana added bonus

OP posts:
Original poster
Nappyzoneisabeetrootrunner · 25/06/2009 13:59

really i was just wondering if any of your 5 and 6 yr olds had had it and how they had took it as i understanmd its a national thing.

OP posts:
southernbelle77 · 25/06/2009 15:51

Not sure how I feel honestly, but guess it can't be a bad thing! Think dd must have been learning about things like that at school as she is know drawing rather too accurate pictures of men and woman! (yeah ok maybe I'm a prude!). Did suggest that if she wanted to give said pictures to her best friend it might be better that the pictures had clothes on as wasn't sure how said friends parents would respond!

I do like the idea of it coming from a teacher now I've thought about it as I know dd will take into account what is said at school more than she will from me at times, and if it helps her learn what is and isn't appropriate then that can't be a bad thing either!

Original poster
Nappyzoneisabeetrootrunner · 25/06/2009 17:29

yeah i am coming round to it more - ther is a meeting next Thrsday now to discuss any issues with parents which im glad about. At least we will know how much they are going into it all and how. My DH has his mega prude head on though as he is worried if they go into puberty and stuff it will rob her childhood type thing.

OP posts:
seeker · 25/06/2009 17:59

Innocence and ignorance are not the same thing at all.

Original poster
Nappyzoneisabeetrootrunner · 25/06/2009 18:25

sorry seeker i dont get who or what your getting at ?

OP posts:
Elibean · 25/06/2009 18:59

Is it national? wonder why dd hasn't had it yet then....though they do get lots of 'how to look after yourself' stuff, mostly on sunscreen, hygiene, teeth, etc.

I shall demand to know where dd's sex ed is, then!

zeke · 25/06/2009 19:29

Seems a bit strange at that age!

I answer my son's questions regarding making babies etc and use term like 'uterus' and 'gamete' (I will NOT uses the word sperm with him!). I have managed to gloss over how the male gamete gets inside the female, although he does ask. I have used diagrams etc.

TBH I think it is up to the parent to answer those type of questions at that age (my son is in reception).

meemarsgotabrandnewbump · 25/06/2009 19:54

Hi zeke - can I ask why you think it's strange to tell them at that age. And what's wrong with the word sperm!?

I do admit it felt odd going into the details with DS1 at first, because we are trained to feel a bit embarrassed about it. But the more he asked, the more it felt innappropriate to hide stuff from him, or gloss over. After all, it's only basic biology.

Because he is curious, he was only satisfied so far with "there was an egg in mummy's tummy which turned into a baby". He wanted to know how. Then once I explained about fertilisation he needed to know how the sperm got to the egg. So there was no point in faffing about.

It really is no big deal to him, now that his initial curiosity has been answered.

aniseed · 25/06/2009 20:15

From my experience (as a teacher and a mum) quite young children really enjoy these lessons and are very interested and curious. A good school will always involve the parents when introducing something new and it is important for you to know what is being taught each week so you can follow it up at home. Children in my class (year 2) were very mature (and knew most of it already). It is just giving them the right vocabulary. Teachers have to follow a strict curriculum for each age group so they can only give the children so much information. It is also important for children to be aware that their bodies are private as so many cases of abuse go missed because of ignorance. My 3 yr old knows the proper names for body parts (although we both prefer to use slang names) and he knows exactly how he was made. Kids are naturally curious - it's not perverted or sexual.

frogs · 25/06/2009 20:24

Cos gamete is an easier word for a 5yo than 'sperm'?

For heaven's sake, if they ask questions just tell them the answers. I'm with seeker on this. Knowing the names of body parts and simple facts of life in an age-appropriate way doesn't mean they're not innocent. Not knowing may make them ignorant, and definitely makes them more susceptible to the kind of disinformation floating around most school playgrounds.

If you don't supply them with neutral, factual information then you run the risk that they'll get their information from any other child who has more sexual knowledge than they do. This is likely to be a more streetwise but rather under-parented child who's got his info from his older brother's dirty mags (or worse).

There are 14yo in my dd1's class who can't bring themselves to say the word 'period'. How the flipping nora are they going to negotiate intimate relationships and keep themselves safe? It's not a good look, and they ended up that way because they got the message at an early age that there are some things that adults are embarrassed to talk about.

seeker · 25/06/2009 22:17

Came on to explain my innocence/ignorance distinction, but frogs has done it for me. Thank you.

Why gamete not sperm? And why gloss over how it happens?

SolidGoldBrass · 25/06/2009 22:20

'daddy has a penis and mummy a whotsit'

If you can't even bring yourself to type the word VAGINA, OP, then your DC need decent sex education at school.

TheFallenMadonna · 25/06/2009 22:22

ROFL at using 'male gamete' with a 5yo rather than 'sperm'.

Original poster
Nappyzoneisabeetrootrunner · 25/06/2009 22:35

jeez give me a break! VAGINA ! VAGINA VAGINA! perhaps they use the word VULVA VULVA VULVA - sorry! She has just gone 6 - she hasnt asked about anything sex wise so i have had no reason to avoid or broach the subject thats all. Im not running scared i am just aware i wasnt educated till late juniors/ early secondary on the subject. Six seems young thats all.

OP posts:
SolidGoldBrass · 25/06/2009 22:41
zeke · 25/06/2009 22:44

I don't think it is strange to tell children about this, but I do think it is strange to deal with it at school at such a young age.

Personally, I think there is nothing wrong with the word sperm. However, and this is the issue, I would fear that he would use the word at school and that may lead to a whole lot of trouble! I am pretty certain that a lot of parents don't want to have these discussions at that age. I certainly don't want my son to be the one that tells the other kids at school about sex - that is the only reason why I gloss over it.

I don't understand the whole 'tummy' thing. Always used uterus. My son even asked one of the ladies at nursery (who was pregnant) whether she had a boy or a girl in her uterus when he was about 2/3. He knows that girls have a uterus and boys do not.