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Primary education

Join our Primary Education forum to discuss starting school and helping your child get the most out of it.

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Original poster

all play...not work

26 replies

mumnotarobot · 27/01/2009 17:51

arrrgh. Hey all. need to let off some steam. DS 6 wants to do no homework, writing, spellings anything basically to do with school work. He rather play. It does get frustrating as i really rather escape this turmoil of having to plead with him other school work. He is fine watching tv and playing with his toys...mention school work and he begins to cry. All i have him do a day is half hour of maths, literacy and genreal studies every other day, which i dont think is a lot at all. We do read daily which he is beginning to enjoy, but any suggestions of how to make school work at home enjoyable. I mean it really is give and take. IS HALF HOUR THAT MUCH???

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PandaG · 27/01/2009 17:54

yes, tbh I think it is too much. Does school set the homework or are you imposing it?

I would be happy with 10 mins reading, and maybe a practise of spellings for 5 mins or so per day, maximum. The spelling practice done at a separate time, when walking to school or whatever, so an informal learning not forced.

ChasingSquirrels · 27/01/2009 18:01

1/2hr in total or of each?
I used to make sure ds1 (6, yr1) read everyday, now we just read his bedtime story together as I know that he puts the light back on and carries on reading after I leave him.
I have just started getting him to write in his own reading record, so he writes the title and thinks of a sentance about the book.
And he currently has homework which takes a max of 5 mins 3 times a week. I tell him to do it, but don't enforce it.

Original poster

mumnotarobot · 27/01/2009 18:03

tbh i am imposing this simply because he is behind at school. He lacks focus and this is beginning to concern me. The half hour sessions are broken down in 15 mins slots. And i wish it was everyday. I dread doing it so it happens maybe twice a week if im lucky.
The thing with him is he knows what he has to do but doesnt concentrate and in some ways fears the whole concept of being still and having to focus on one thing. Thats not a good thing. And as rigid as it may seem how do i know the teachers have the patience to give him this attention that i do.

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Original poster

mumnotarobot · 27/01/2009 18:07

chasing the 1/2hr is on one subject broken down in 15 mins slots. eg This week we are focusing on spelling. So he would think of 5 things he enjoys the most at present...eg football/dance and i write them out on cards and he writes them out while learning his blending. He has as many breaks as he wants... not camp. lol Sometimes we may not finish all, but once he gets the hang of knwoning how to spell the word of something he enjoys he is proud of himself and i notice the change in him the next time around.

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PrimulaVeris · 27/01/2009 18:15

It's quite normal for a 6 yo not to concentrate. I had to do extra reading/phonics with my ds at that age because he was behind ... but about 10 to 15 mins per day tops. Half an hour way too much I think.

Littlefish · 27/01/2009 18:23

Have school said that he is behind? What strategies are they using at school? In my opinion, half an hour is too long. 10 minutes after school in year 1 is enough.

Can he focus on something he enjoys - e.g. lego, playmobil etc?

Original poster

mumnotarobot · 27/01/2009 18:27

The school has said he is behind and they will be starting a scheme next term for kids to reach targets etc. However what drove me to write this post in the first place is because his football coach two weeks running has had concerns with him. He says he is great but lacks concentration and focus. His teachers have also been saying that for quite some time now.

I will cutt out the half hour. Thanks. I just dont know what is too much and what isnt. I guess in saying that every child is different.

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Littlefish · 27/01/2009 18:29

Does he like going to football?

ramonaquimby · 27/01/2009 18:33

he is 6, not year 6?

I think 30 min a night is far too much at that age.

Original poster

mumnotarobot · 27/01/2009 18:33

he loves it... i think i know where ur going with this. every activity he attends is chosen by him. Infact i rather he went to karate b ut he chose football. lol
i think i should just chill out.

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Original poster

mumnotarobot · 27/01/2009 18:36

not each night ramonquimby. every other night..if im lucky. timed him today it was 15 mins. i think it takes half hour because he gets distracted.

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ramonaquimby · 27/01/2009 18:39

maybe put the timer away for a bit and see what he'd like to do?

Niecie · 27/01/2009 18:39

Yep I have to agree that 5 to 10 minutes is enough in Yr 1. They don't have the attention span for more after a long day at school.

Can I just clarify something - are you setting the spelling tests or are you?

muppetgirl · 27/01/2009 18:40

if you want him to do some writing at home then I would first make the session shorter and definately more fun.

Use shaving foam, porrigde oats on a tray or chalks outside on the tarmac. This is is still encourageing letter formation, physical memory and spelling but makes it a darn sight more interesting!

Make letters out of playdough, set a timer so he knows (and trusts) there will be an end to his session. Datr with 5 mins then extend once he's happy with 5 mins. It sounds like he's lost a little trust as you have a goal and the session doesn;t finish until you've finished.

Also he has learned that if he cries or gets upset then he is in charge of how the session goes.

muppetgirl · 27/01/2009 18:40

awful spelling, sorry!

Original poster

mumnotarobot · 27/01/2009 18:50

hmmm interesting. i think i will definately take those ideas on board muppetgirl. Esp timer and playdough. He i learnin g to tell time so that will be an added bonus. However i dont want to come across as some hitler. I dont fuss him. Which is the interesting thing. I encourage him. And speak to him and try and allow him to see the benefits of being focused. I do however know how to back down, and its not a case of dictatorship. I guess although we are all mums we have different ways of doing things and have different expectations. I think it is important for my child age 6 or whatever age he is to be discipline in all he does.

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Littlefish · 27/01/2009 18:51

Good post Muppet girl - agree about the need for him to rebuild trust that the session will finish.

Tomato ketchup on a plate is good for writing. Disgusting, but good

muppetgirl · 27/01/2009 18:55

I have the same issues with ds at school, this is how I go about making sure he doesn't get behind. We also come in and read before the tv goes on so tv doesn't go on until reading is done.

What do you ask him to do?

Are you in line with what school is expecting?

muppetgirl · 27/01/2009 18:59

littlefish -tommy ketch a FAB idea!!! Ds 1 would love that!

We also drew round dh's car (and mine) labelled them 'Mummy's parking space, Daddy's parking space' then when I came home from school I parked in daddy's spot so dh then was in the wrong one. Ds made him a parking ticket as a joke - he loved it!

I think it's about purpose for writing...

Get him to do shopping lists, cards for family, eamils to friends.

muppetgirl · 27/01/2009 19:00

my spelling!!!!!

stuffitllama · 27/01/2009 19:00

If you do lots of reading I'm sure he won't fall behind from not doing any literacy homework.

muppetgirl · 27/01/2009 19:01

my spelling!!!!!

Original poster

mumnotarobot · 27/01/2009 19:04

lol about ur spelling. Thank u. Its great advice. Will take on board most definatley.

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piscesmoon · 27/01/2009 19:18

You are really going to put him off if you try and do school work at home when he has already had a long day. I am with muppetgirl-make it fun. You can do lots with games.There is no reason for him to know that it is work!

cory · 27/01/2009 19:23

I went through a phase when I relaxed the homework rules for a while about this age, as dd was just getting distressed and not learning anything. I kept writing in the diary: dd was too tired to learn tonight.

This has not caused her to grow up into an undisciplined and uneducated person: at 12 she is now taking full responsibility for her own projects and homework and getting excellent marks, doing far more than necessary.

If he is behind at school, it may be that the work is simply too difficult for him and he needs extra support. Have you spoken to the teacher about this? My ds has had quite a bit of extra support over the years and it has made a far bigger difference to him than a bit of extra homework would have done.

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