DS starting school but can’t wipe!

[OhCrapOhDear]

DS starting school in a couple of weeks, he’s summer born, not long turned 4.
It took us a while to get to grips with toilet training but now he’s great, never any accidents and goes when he needs to... but he cannot wipe himself after a number 2.
He’s tried but just makes a complete mess, which then upsets him and he refuses to try again for a while. He’s starting reception very soon... what on earth do I do? Is there any hope that he will crack this before he starts?

My DSs were both similar at that age.

DS1 has never, ever done a poo at school (even though he is 10 now and wipes his own bum perfectly well!)

DS2 came home a bit dirty a few times, but just got on with it. He definitely got better over time - because he had to! He's 7 now and sorts himself out 99% of the time without any bother.

I guess for now I can only hope he doesn’t need a poo during school hours!
I feel terrible about it though, hate the thought of him struggling and then getting upset

Make sure you talk to school about exactly where he is at. Toilet accidents are not rare in reception but not the norm.

Try and crack it (no pun intended) over the next couple of weeks. Let school know but don’t expect him to get help with the actual wiping as this won’t happen. He isn’t having accidents it’s just the logistics of the wiping by the sounds of it! If his teacher knows she can guide him to go and have another wipe if he is a bit smelly. Al least the teacher will know he’s not pooped himself and just needs to clean himself up a bit.

Have you sat down and explained that the teachers won't do it for him? Sometimes kids can't do things because it's easier to just let someone else do it!

Many children don’t poo at school for exactly this reason! Send in spare clothes, try to explain to him but I wouldn’t stress hugely. All mine save the poo for hometime even though they now can wipe....😫it’s like dogs who won’t s**t outside their own garden 🙈😂

Just make sure he can change himself in case of accidents and send a spare pair of trousers. Keep trying with him though, is there a physical reason he can't wipe himself?

Thanks for the replies! He never ever has accidents, he’s really good at getting to the toilet, it’s just the wiping he has difficulty with. No physical reason why he can’t do it... he is quite a chunky boy. In no way fat, just heavy set, always has been, I think he finds bending round to wipe quite awkward iykwim.
He doesn’t often have the cleanest of poos though (sorry!)
We shall persevere! I know he’ll get it soon but obviously I’m worried about the school issue!

Like others have said-just let school know. They will not be scandalised or surprised!