Selective vs non selective

[Mummymode]

Hi all. I’ve posted on here a fair bit recently about prep schools. And have been given some good advice on the schools we have offers from but it’s crunch time and we have till Monday morning to accept one. We had no idea it would be so stressful and confusing!! My DH and I are both new to the prep school journey and are quickly coming up to speed after making an unplanned decision to move to prep. So I would love to hear of your experiences or opinions.
So here goes......
We have 2 DS, one to start reception class and the other yr 3 in September 2018. We have 2 offers for both boys at 2 different schools.
School 1: selective at 7+ entry, DS has passed the assessment, 2nd DS for reception entry will not be assessed as such, it’s further away (16miles each way and takes about 40-45min there and 30 min home), it’s a boys school, well reputed and has a really good history of getting most of the year 6 leavers into good selective secondary independants.
The second prep is also a good school, however is non selective at all entry points, much closer (just under 5 miles, 20 min drive in traffic,) also a little cheaper (approx £1000 per term both boys together), the large majority of year 6 leavers obtain grammar school offers, then the next highest % of boys seem to be going to a non selective independent school following with a few going to top selectives. It’s also a co- ed and the girls seemed to have done really well!
We are not sure if location plays a major role in leavers destinations as the second school is within 10-15 miles of an array of grammar schools.

So my DH and I have visited both schools, and met with both heads. We loved both schools...... our eldest DS has spent a day in both, and enjoyed them both equally it would appear.
I guess what we are wondering is it better to pay more and travel further every day for the sake of a more selective school. Or will it have little impact on the outcome of my DS’s achievements?
We just don’t want to make a decision and then regret it later! Xxx

I would definitely go with the non-selective one, it sounds brilliant and is so much closer to your home. Highly selective schools have better results mainly because of their intake. Non-selective schools work very hard to ensure all pupils progress and they are very good at tailoring work to the individual child. Selective schools can be a bit lazy and cookie cutter because they know they have the superstar kids and committed parents. I am speaking of experience as I sent my child to a highly selective school, and I just have not seen the transformation to an amazing child that they make you believe they will do.

The only case where I would consider the superselective school is if you child is clearly highly gifted and really needs to be in a place where there is a higher share of superstar peers. But for most kids who are bright but not spectacular, they can progress just as well if not better in an outstanding non-selective prep

Thankyou @sanam2010. Makes complete sense and backs up what my DH’s concerns have been! Xx