pornography

[julesrose]

Have just heard from the school that a couple of year 6 kids have seen pornography online. School, in a letter to parents, reiterated again about internet filters and parents responsibility etc etc. It seems the school have talked to the children though not clear at all what was said. My DD and her friend who came over asked 'what is pornography.'
I am struggling to think about what to say, and how to explain what pornography is, to a 10 year old.
If I say it's pictures and videos of people having sex, then surely she'd wonder what was so terrible about it. What is an age appropriate way of explaining that it isn't a good thing for children to watch it, that it's exploitative and is fundamentally different to normal loving sex.

'Its rude' end of

Tell her it's because it's illegal for her to watch until she is 18.

My 10 year old asks questions like this from time to time...I've talked to her about the meaning of 'inappropriate' over a variety of issues (some pop videos, eg) and she seems to understand quite well.

I think, if it were me, and I were talking to my own dd (who would want more than 'it's rude') I would talk about pictures of people having sex being used in the wrong way, not respecting privacy, showing off, sometimes aggressive, etc. She knows (I think) that sex is supposed to be something loving and private in the context of a close relationship between grownups...so she'd get it.

That said, I'm always careful to pick up on cues that she's had enough info - she's very good at changing the subject if she's uncomfortable, and hopefully I'm very good at noticing!