Teachers teaching Children about Stranger Danger/Bullying as laid down in School Guidelines!

[WRESTIE]

Should every parent have sight of these guidelines to compliment above? Should we teach it our own way? Are we better at it? Or - should we just leave it to the schools? Touchy Subject!

Whys it a touchy subject? What are you actually asking

As far as I'm aware every school should have an Anti-Bullying Policy which is freely available to students and parents.

The bullying policy for DD's school is inside her school diary for both her and I to see. Stranger danger well we all say don't go with strangers.

Actually I think it's really important we talk with our children about this subject. I was however reading something recently about teaching children "stranger danger" and the term being actually unhelpful to children. Very often the people involved aren't strangers at all. There was a website that used the term "tricky people" giving the message there are dangers from adults who may not be strangers- the overall message was be wary of adults who ask children to help them. Thought overall it was a far more sensible approach. Also there may be occasion where a child needs to ask a stranger for help and needs to be able to identify "safe" people to ask.
The website was American - www.checklistmommy.com

I would be interested to know what my DD's school said about stranger danger. DD came home the other day saying something about talking to strangers, but when I asked her what the teacher had said she apparently couldn't remember. The reason I'm interested is some schools promote a "don't talk to strangers" message which I think is confusing and counterproductive as children talk to strangers all the time - people in shops, random people who stop to ask cute children questions etc, people who are brought into class to give talks - they are all strangers to the child. What I think should be taught instead is along the lines of "don't go anywhere with a stranger".

This has prompted me to ask what our school's policy is!

Apparently, DM said that my brother and I didn't 'believe in strangers' when we were young. Same goes with burglars I think.

Adults that are 'tricky' is better.

I'd be interested in what they say at DS's school. In fact I'll ask later.

Stampstamp is absolutely right! I have found the same thing! Messages going in one ear and out the other! So easily forgotten. And I do ponder on the Question: When is the Friend the Stranger and when is the Stranger the Friend? That's a really hard one to explain the more you think about it. When it comes to Stranger Danger and Bullying or any other safety issue taught in school I personally would insist on knowing exactly how this is being taught to my children in a Parents Evening Discussion so I can raise queries and ask questions! I would want to participate in a way that what the school teaches and what I teach my children compliment each other. Where my children are concerned nothing is left to chance!

Wrestie, most schools will follow a scheme of work for PSHE, set by the local authority. They don't HAVE to follow a scheme, but most do.

If you're that interested, then ask the school if they have a copy / electronic copy that you could see.

Alternatively, lots of schools still follow SEAL which is available online.

It's great that you talk to your child about these things, but lots of parents don't, or else the children get mixed messages from the adults at home. School are able to teach the ideas in an objective way. I don't really get what the problem is with that- there are lots and lots of discussions that your child will have at school about general safety and being part of a community; stranger danger is just one aspect.

Have you tried just asking them...?

Yes I have asked and will be seeing for myself now exactly how this information is being conveyed to children! When you consider in the UK News recently the two little girls (who I believe were 9/8)(not babies) who were enticed away by a man saying he had a little Girl in his apartment who was lonely and would the children come and see her! And they believed him and went! Then told their horrified parents what had happened! (Thank GOD their Parents were quick to believe them and act) I really do worry whether guideline messages are sinking in! So! I am off to Look - Listen and Learn! And ask questions! In this day and age I don't think Parents can ever be too Careful!

I'm confused- are you annoyed that school talked to your children about stranger danger, or glad that they did?

I am in no way confused. But sometimes I feel that children can be! I believe 'anything' that helps a child understand how to be safe and stay safe in very important indeed and an absolute 'MUST' in this Day and Age. But its worth remembering that it is a well known fact that when we say something to someone, we may know exactly what we are trying to convey but they are just not receiving it that way! They are actually hearing something different! All the more reason why we should ensure that the Messages given to our children on safety are being received the way we intend them to be! i.e. Talking 'to' children not 'at' them or 'over' them as sometimes happens. I am really looking forward to reading through the School Guidelines. They will be an interesting read!

Safer strangers seems to be the accepted term nowadays

You might not be confused, but I am

I don't understand the confusion. Just keep talking to your children about the issues. And if the school talks to them as well, so much the better. It's not as if the school is going to tell them "feel free to go off with any stranger that takes your fancy!" They are going to be giving the same message as you - possibly in different words, but the same message. And actually, you don't really know which person your children will pay more attention to. So the more people that tell them the better.