DD has been bitten - WWYD

[AngelDelightIsIndeedDelightful]

Hi all,

DD1 is in Reception. I picked her up tonight from the nursery who take care of her after school and they mentioned that when they picked her up they noticed some red marks on her arm. When questioned, dd told them that a little girl bit her at school, but she didn't tell the teacher.

She has told me the same story and I have no reason to disbelieve them, although we've only been there a few weeks and I haven't built up trust yet. I can't think of any reason why they would want to hide it happening on their watch, it's not a serious injury.

My dilemma is whether to mention it to school or not. She usually does breakfast club (I work ft) but I'm actually working from home tomorrow so will be taking the opportunity to walk her to school (for once ) so I could speak to them then. Unfortunately her usual teacher is with the year 5s on a trip to France, but I have met her TA several times as she does the breakfast club. I don't want to make a big thing of it (learnt that lesson when I got my judgy pants on when she was bitten as a toddler at nursery, only to have to get them off sharpish when she then started biting herself a couple of weeks later). Dd is not traumatised at all.

Would you mention it or wait to see if anything happens again?

I would just mention to them that maybe there needs to be some way of them communicating with you, through book bag or something so you know if something happened at school or at nursery after school. However you also need to ask your DD if she told someone when it happened, quite often they don't (my DD4 has twice come home with scratches from a little boy in her class so far and she hasn't told anyone). The school can't do anything if your DD didn't tell them. Have a quite, not wanting to mention but thought I would let you know type word. Softly softly always works better :)

If she hasn't told the teacher how can you expect them to know? It is unfair to imply they have hidden it from you when they weren't aware if it.

I didn't expect school to know. In my second paragraph I was referring to nursery, but reading it back now I didn't actually make that very clear, apologies.

I don't think school has done anything wrong at all - I don't expect them to be mind readers! If she had told them, they would have told the nursery staff member who picked her up, who would then tell me. We've had a message before so I know that system works.

I'm not 100% happy with nursery for various reasons and so it did enter my head that it might have happened there and then they'd blamed school but that's all a bit far fetched, even for my over active imagination.

Definately mention it to the school, they will want to know for the benefit of your dd, and the biter.

Mention it in the way of you think they may want to watch "X" as they bit DD yesterday, you don't know the circumstances but thought they may want to keep an eye out for any further biting. Stress that your DD is OK and you have told her in future she must tell a teacher straight away as you know they can now not do anything about it other than keep an eye out for future :)

I mentioned it to her supply teacher this morning, who was horrified. She said she'd have a word with dd and "get to the bottom of it". I emphasised that she was fine and smiled a lot so she didn't think I was getting at them!

I just wanted to make sure I wasn't being OTT by talking to them, so thanks for the reassurance that I wasn't